I am becoming to realize that its just the "two" of us.

Yesterday, I took my son to the park. I got him on a swing when a couple (mother & father) along with their baby approached me and got their baby on the other swing. I am pushing my son and they are pushing theirs. They are all laughing and enjoying each other and their baby. I felt so lonely and uncomfortable. I realized that now it was just my son and myself. No more of my husband, No more Dad to my son. It felt like an…

I am thankful for what i have. I am thankful for having a beatiful son, Sebastian, who is the result of the strong love my husband and I shared. I am thankful for Sebastian looking exactly the same as his daddy. I am thankful for having food to eat, a sweater to wear, a bed to sleep in, and a beatiful and most amazing/supportive mother. But can't help to think and shift my mind more towards all of the things I no longer have. I dont have my father here with me. I dont have my husband either…

i have not been able to stop my tears since this morning. i hear, see all of the emotion in others for the holidays to come. i feel envy for those happy family's hosting dinners, getting together and looking forward to spending the holidays together. However, I must admitt, i too, was there just last year.

I cant help to see elderly grandfather's holding their grandchildren, or playing with them at the park. How i wish my father was here to do the same with my son. I see a young…

I wonderfully dream with my husband real often. Last night's dream was so much more real than others. It was wonderful and sweet. I felt his real presence.Happy times, as the ones we both had before his passing. It lasted long. I was happy again. I had a purpose, I was cared for, I was protected, I was loved. Never did I wanted to leave that dream.

However, when waken up this morning by my 2…

I just remember and found a couple of days ago, a special song my husband often sang to me when we were just dating.. Some of the lyrics said the following:

"Only God, Only Death, Will Ever Separate Me From Your Love"

The above came true, as today I realize that yes, Death did separated us from our Love.…