All Blog Posts (2,636)

Dear Maman

Bonjour Maman,

 

i miss you so much every single day. not one day goes by that i don't think of you and feel incredible sadness like i have never experienced in my life.

 

i often wonder if you are embodied in the sparrows i see flying over your garden. i often think that is you, checking up on  us, the garden, the house. you know we miss you so much every day and wish we could see your smiling face again.

 

i can't believe it has been almost 2…

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Added by chrissy m on July 22, 2011 at 8:17pm — No Comments

Black Fades To White

I still can't believe it's been 5 months since my dad passed.  I find myself still completely forgetting everything that has happened and going about my day as if all is well. Busy at work, keeps my brain busy and then it hits me that he's gone.  For weeks go by and I'm thinking he's still here.  But he's not. The severe pain is gone and I'm shocked that it seems to have faded so quickly.  The black pain seems to be gone, but now there's some mixed in with a bit of white... a light at the end… Continue

Added by Elke on July 22, 2011 at 2:44pm — No Comments

My Son Matt

I just found this site....My son Matt was a creative, talented musician.....Wife to Jessica, Brother to Philip & Joe... and Son to Patti & Phil....He left this world on June 28, 2006...way too soon... in a car crash.  He was on his way home from a music performance and fell asleep at the wheel...In the daytime he was a Chef at O'Charlies....It has been five years and yet I feel I have just begun to accept......

Added by Patti Meadows on July 21, 2011 at 8:26pm — No Comments

Another day, and tomorrow makes 2 weeks since I buried her.

God help me tonight. My heart hurts so much. I love'd rosie with everything. I'm lost. I come  home and talk to her parents, and we share stories, and how much we all loved her, and miss her. I just at times don't know what to do.

 

I miss her laughter, and chatter, I miss the simple companionship we shared. I don't know what else to do. I'm feeling very sad lately.

Added by Anne Delina Johnson on July 21, 2011 at 7:19pm — No Comments

Rosie's final moments

 I lost my best friend to Ovarian Cancer. I moved from Portland, Oregon, to New Jersey to be with her 5 years ago when she was first Diagnosed. We'd been like sisters for what would have been 11 years this christmas. She was just 38 years old. I was there the night she died. I saw her go from being somewhat ok, and her radiation of the brain working, to suffering with breathing. I had to call her Parents, at home at 5:30 in the morning on July 4th, and demand they come to the hospital…

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Added by Anne Delina Johnson on July 20, 2011 at 8:32pm — 2 Comments

Making sense of it all....

Hello,

My name is Sue. I am a 55 year old divorced 2 years ago. I barely survived that pain and loss (20 year married). Left me for of course, a younger woman. I lost everything. He had been planning his departure for a year.  I am on this wonderful support site because June 7, 2011 my adorable, loving, strong, wonderful best friend and mother Nancy Preston died from complications from chemo therapy (throat cancer). She had been a heavy smoker but quit 20 years ago. Her lungs were…

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Added by Sue Waxman on July 20, 2011 at 11:31am — 8 Comments

Still.

Why do I feel like 2 years is too long for me to still feel this way? I still feel just as helpless and hopeless when most people would probably not be "over it" by now but coping a lot better than I am. I still have outbursts of rage more often than I'd like to admit. I still unintentionally make those closest to me suffer with me. I know I will never be "normal" again, but I just wish that I could feel like I've made some sort of progress. Seriously, every day I weigh the option…

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Added by Stefanie Parise on July 20, 2011 at 10:11am — No Comments

MY MOTHER... WHO i NEVER MET...

~~~~ My entire life I have always wondered how it would be the day I would find you. Yes I grew up in a great environment... Thanks to you picking out my adopted parents for me. But there has always been an emptiness inside me. I wonder.. did you hold me that day you gave birth to me... before you gave up your rights?? Throughout the years ... did you think of me on my birthday...? Christimas? Any holiday? Did you even remember my birthday or my older sisters' who you gave up as well? Do I get… Continue

Added by LISA DURVIN on July 19, 2011 at 3:51pm — No Comments

Having a pretty rough day.

Woke up not too long ago and it's already one of those days where I wish I didn't get out of bed. It really sucks when people who live with you kind of get upset or disappointed when you need help with things you wouldn't normally. It makes me feel like such a burden. They just don't understand, I guess. It doesn't make them bad people. Still - I just wish things could go back to normal. I'm accustomed to depression and all the "fun" that comes with it, but this is something that I will…

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Added by Stefanie Parise on July 19, 2011 at 1:10pm — No Comments

My Beloved by VNV Nation

This is a beautiful song, and I cry every time I hear it. Listen to it here if you'd like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N939-xgTBrM

 

 

It's colder than before

The seasons took all they had come for

Now winter dances here

It seems so fitting,…

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Added by Stefanie Parise on July 15, 2011 at 11:30pm — 1 Comment

A new love

  Grief is a strange thing. Everyone grieves at their own pace... in their own time. I was fortunate enough to have my friends, family, and support group around me. 

  Love is also a strange thing. It comes to us, oftentimes, when we least expect it. When we aren't looking for it.

  When Matt died, I thought my world had ended. But in an unfortunate turn of events, I found out many things about him that made it easier for me to pick up the pieces and start moving on. He wasn't…

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Added by Natasha L. on July 6, 2011 at 1:59pm — 3 Comments

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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