shawn help me through tomorrow

dear god I prayed the fifth would never come.  how can it be 2 years when I remember it like yesterday. I cry everyday, I pray you will come back to me. this hell im living in cant go on much  longer, I miss you so very much and need so bad to hear your voice once more. how can this be  happening how? I want so much to be with you, to hold my baby again. shawn my life is over please take my hand, take me home with you. im so alone, empty. why wont god take me to you, why is he making me suffer so much. I want so much to laugh again, smile again and I can only do that when im holding you. I pray please god take me to my son, my life, my beautiful baby.  take away my river of tears each and every day.  take my unbearable pain away, I beg you shawn please please help me. let me die please.  always and forever  mom. 

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Comment by Jesse's Mom on November 5, 2015 at 10:27am

Kim, thinking of you today. Saying your son's name today:

Shawn, Shawn, Shawn, may your mom feel your energy close today for love never dies.

Comment by Teresa D. on November 5, 2015 at 8:22am

Thinking of you today Kim.

Comment by kim on November 5, 2015 at 6:23am

thank you so very much for thinking of us today. its such a very hard day, every day is. I know you are all hurting to so again thank you   kim

Comment by morgan on November 5, 2015 at 1:58am

Kim, I read your posts and just never have enough to say that I feel will help you as I hear your pain is so deep and so unmanageable.  I come to this website because it is here we can be honest about how we feel and talk to each other but at the same time it is crushing to read how broken we all seem to be and how difficult it is to make any kind of dent in the pain.  Please know I will be thinking of you in the hopes that at one point in the day you will feel Shawn in your heart telling you he is waiting for you in a different space and time but he is waiting.  The kind of patience it takes to manage this pain is beyond my own understanding but I hate hearing how hard it is for others.  I wish for you a few moments of peace which Shawn would also want for you.  Do at least one thing he would want you to do for yourself and know he is right there holding you close.

Comment by Felicia on November 5, 2015 at 12:22am

I am so sorry your hurting. I will keep you in my prayer tonight. Though it doesn't help your pain, just know that I do care, even though we don't know each other.

Comment by Felicia on November 5, 2015 at 12:19am

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My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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