Comment

Comment by Gabrielle on May 25, 2015 at 5:35pm

I agree, it is better to let it out and have a little (or big!) cry whenever we want to. I'm a firm believer in feeling grief and not trying to bottle things up or keep myself so busy that I'm not dealing with anything. It's good to have a routine of course and to make plans. But I never want to stop myself thinking about my sister. At the moment my love for her is the reason for my misery but I hope one day it will be the reason for me to continue. We'll see. I am yet to see the light because I only want to see her, not a future without her.

Comment by Felicia Evans on May 25, 2015 at 10:46am

Take time every day to do something in memory of your love one. I know it is so hard right now. I'm taking one day at a time, one minute at a time. I was just folding laundry and this sadness came over me...I just want to cry. I allow myself to cry for a little while. Then I get up and keep going one step at a time. Peace be with you on this day and the days ahead.

Comment by dream moon JO B on May 22, 2015 at 3:24pm

2 day is 1 of my low days 

Comment by Felicia Evans on May 17, 2015 at 5:13pm

Hi

Comment by Denise on May 17, 2015 at 4:21pm

Hi

Comment by dream moon JO B on May 17, 2015 at 3:41pm

me 2 felica sorry 4 evrys loss new 1s on hear as well old 1s on hear

i no 1 thn we ask why me we do we wil ask it evry day why me

Comment by Felicia Evans on May 17, 2015 at 2:55pm

I'm sorry for everyone's loss. It really is difficult. This just painful. It's like I've loss something that I want to find but its gone. I'm tired of people saying you will see him again, it was his time to go, and he is in a better place. I guess I'm selfish I want my nephew here. I don't want him to suffer or be sad but I need him here. His 7 kids need him too. His wife has already moved on to another man and it hasn't even been 6 months...oh well. I just keep reminding myself of the serenity prayer. Still I mis talking and texting my nephew.

Comment by Gabrielle on May 17, 2015 at 1:29pm

Yes, it's very isolating. I've got a good support network of friends but that has dwindled as the months have passed...they are still there but only a few don't look bored when I talk about my sister. I can tell they want me to go back to talking about concerts, dates, holidays, nights out and other superficial things. Not a dead sister, death, the after life. Who wants to talk about that over dinner?

Even those that are willing to listen don't know HER; don't know our relationship, don't know all her little quirks and our jokes and our faultless relationship. Don't appreciate that I was brought up changing her, washing her, putting her to bed because she was 8 years younger than me. Don't appreciate that I watched that person grow into a lovely 22 year old and I know every feature and facial expression SO well. They don't realise the wonderful dynamic of having a motherly, sister, and best friend relationship. So really we do go through this journey alone. Talking to the one we have loved and lost and hoping they can hear us.

Comment by rachel_micele on May 16, 2015 at 9:09pm

I am currently experiencing this divide between those of us in grief and those who are not, as mentioned in the last handful of comments. For some grief is an uncomfortable topic, for some being around a grieving person in general is uncomfortable, but for those who are closest to us it's just that their world didn't stop dead in it's tracks, only ours. Going through deep grief you really are in a completely different world than everyone else. I feel you can't hold them to expectations of meeting you in yours but you can't act like you're in sync with theirs and all is well. It's very isolating.

Comment by Gabrielle on May 14, 2015 at 4:44pm

Michelle and Amy: you've hit the nail on the head.
I've been gripped by grief for just over 3 months and I'm amazed at how there really is a big divide between people who are 'tuned in' to loss, and those that are mentally/emotionally incapable of going there. X

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