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At this point and time I thank the lord for making me into a strong women. I am a private mourner. I have the strength to walk away from arguments. Losing two sons so close together. has been a living hell. I am on some really strong meds to help me cope with it all. My heart is shattered, I refuse to let other people get to me i don't explain my meds either. So they think I am a bipolar bitch thats fine, my finances too. i am refusing to raise my voice and have a screaming match over thing that are nobodys business. I have been accused of alot of things that r not right. they want to push buttons. that hasn't worked either. I am thankful to be away. I am thankful to have found a new place. I just want to be left alone. i am consumed with greif. crying rivers of tears. Miss my boys. the 22nd is the third anniversay of my oldest sons passing. I beleive there is a god. I beleive both my boys are with god. but here on earth i am heart broken to lose them. I pray every day that no other person to go through this.
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Susan you have nothing to explain to anyone. You are a strong woman. It amazing me at the insensitivity some people have. Unless they have gone through a loss like this themselves they don't have a clue. Looking back on my life I see the moments when I could have reached out to others that were in this kind of pain but I didn't know how. I see people looking at me different - afraid to talk about it for fear of setting me off. People ask how I am but it sounds like the most ridiculous question.
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