Yesterday was my grandmothers birthday. It was also the day my mother passed away. I know her absence has been apart of my life for awhile. I didn't cry yesterday as much I have in the past. I miss my mom every single day. But I thought about it...

Yes, I miss her. But I have to keep living. I can not let my mother's death stop me from trying in life. I know that may sound kind of rude, mean or harsh. But I am aware that she would only want to see me happy and see me try my very best at life.

I went down the whole destructive path. I wanted to be bad. I wanted to throw tantrums and stomp my feet. I wanted to hate the entire world. I was in pain. I wanted the rest of the world to suffer as I did. But me being like that does not change the truth, which is my mothers physical appearance can no longer be seen. But in my smiling and loving her spirit is always around.

I'm a lover of life. I love people. And I don't want to change that about myself. I feel that my mother left behind her heart and her warm spirit as a gift for me to carry on and share with others. I don't have many pictures of her, so this is my way of carrying on her memory. By being positive.

Graduation is sooner than I think and I'm ready!