Last night was tough....very tough.  2 years ago, I thought he was going to die then. It was an emotional month while he was in ICU and step down.  But, it was the same date (5 months ago) that he went to his peace and I went here.  Today was not good either...especially when my mom realized what yesterday was and facebook showed a memory of him last year...almost healthy.  Some one said that the dates are hard, but it gets more routine.

There are times that I  wonder if I was too selfish for wanting him to stay in this world with me after the accident.  Believe me, I do know that his extra year and a half with us helped my   grandson, and even me in preparing for my folks.  But I knew he was in  pain all day, everyday. So, today is my guilt trip day, as well as one of the scariest days of my life.  It has been difficult to carry out my  responsibilities today.  And I hope I can get to sleep tonight.