Death has become like just another every day thing to me. My gran has recently been diagnosed with lung cancer. She is 82 and decided not to receive treatment. Doctors don't think she will live to see next year. In 2009 my other gran died, in 2010 my dad died, and in 2011 my mom died. I have become "numb" at the idea of death. It is part of life and one day I will go too. I am 26 and only having a younger sister left as my close family, I am getting paranoid that something will happen to her too, leaving me as the survivor of our family. All my close family members are gone besides her and my gran who has now come to terms with her illness and fate. She said she wants to see my dad again, her oldest son who passed away in 2010. Now I feel so like I am being abandoned, left here on earth alone with no parental figures. They go to heaven and here I stay, alone, having to look after myself and my sister. And all I think is, okay, there is nobody else left. Next it is either me or my sister. Very morbid to think about, but it is the truth. Life is cruel :(
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