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Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on April 2, 2015 at 1:49pm

There were places that Mark had talked about taking me, but we never got to go. One of these days I am youths Vietnam War Memorial in his honor. 

Comment by morgan on April 2, 2015 at 1:37pm

To all on this thread.  You are all in the very early stages of losing the most important person in your life.  Depending on the depth of your relationship to your loved one you are going to feel this way for quite  awhile yet. You will go through all the emotions you have already felt and more and then you will rinse and repeat over an over.  You will wonder how it can be this way.  I had to go into the shower yet again this morning and cry my eyes out under the water, asking for release.  I triggered it myself looking at the photos of him during his last month alive between the hospital and home.

I am convinced the "feelings" never go away.  Don't let anyone push you into not recognizing those feelings.  I have managed to push away those who are unable to handle me.  It probably wasn't the best idea I've had but I need to do whatever it is that my emotions are telling me I need to do.  I have no other choice.  Probably neither do you.  

The best thing I have found to help me through this is going on websites where other grieving people like you and me are able without judgment to unload.  Keep doing it.  At least we know there is someone who understands.

Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on April 2, 2015 at 1:08pm

I think that's one of the things that I miss the most. My husband and I loved to hold hands. From the walking stick, to the walker, to the wheelchair, he still would find a way to hold my hand. Even as he died.

Comment by George H on April 2, 2015 at 1:08pm

John I know that feeling mary and I did everything together now I don't see the point in doing anything it's all just dark and lonely

Comment by Dianne M. on April 2, 2015 at 1:08pm

We were planning an Alaskan cruise next year for our 20th anniversary. We bought matching coats and had picked out so many things. Now nothing to look forward to or plan. I dont want to go anywhere without him. Going all the places we used to go is hard enough without thinking about all the plans we had. So NOT right or fair.

Comment by George H on April 2, 2015 at 1:01pm

Thanks tildyc

Comment by Tildyc on April 2, 2015 at 12:52pm

George and m morgan- thank you for those beautiful poems. I especially like the message in yours m morgan. And George- Hold on to that dog and just let it happen. There's no set rules on this mourning business. You just lost your soulmate and if you don't have it in you to get up and go out somewhere or try and accomplish things- then you don't have to George. My gosh – you justblost Mary in February. And I'm right there with you. When I'm not working, most often, I'm sitting in front of the stupid TV and crying. So- in my humble opinion – we are all doing the best we can within the horrendous circumstances we have been presented with at this point in time.

Comment by Sandy Elaine Norris on April 2, 2015 at 11:32am

Okay. I'm crying now!

Comment by Dianne M. on April 2, 2015 at 11:26am

Both poems touched me deeply. I know he is there and I can see things he is subtly doing. Just miss him so much my heart aches and the pain is just awful.

Why are we all in this horrible boat together???

Comment by George H on April 2, 2015 at 11:24am

Thanks so much

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