Comment

Comment by Steve Suehiro on June 30, 2015 at 5:11pm

John T.-   As a funeral director in California, I know that Diane could not have been cremated without a disposition permit being issued.  Did you tell the mortuary that you intention was to have Diane cremated and her cremated remains interred at Mission San Luis Rey?  If so, this should already be listed on the permit. If you did this and a new permit needs to be issued at this time,  this is an error that is the fault of the mortuary.

PM me if you would like me to contact the mortuary on your behalf to make an inquiry

Comment by Trina Mamoon on June 30, 2015 at 3:21pm

Thank you, Steve Suehiro, for your constructive comments. Yes, this site is very diverse:members are at different stages of grief, are of different ages, and from backgrounds. The one thing that brings us all together is grief, the unspeakable grief of having lost a beloved soulmate. I think it would serve us all best if we try to keep in mind that no matter what stage we at or the circumstances, we all are in deep pain, that's why we visit this site, so treating each other with respect and sensitivity will go a long way in helping our fellow members. I, for one, come to this forum for support and sympathy, and that's what I expect to find here. And of course, us venting about our emotions and complaining about our life, that's very common here too.

Comment by Steve Suehiro on June 30, 2015 at 2:22pm

I was not privy to whatever it was that caused the turmoil here since apparently those posts were taken down.  But I will say that while it is not appropriate for anyone to be insensitive  or rude here to each other, let us please keep in mind that not everyone here on the page is at the same point in recovery as everyone else,  and not everyone here is the same age.   At 47 I think back to my mindset at 20 and I cannot even begin to recognize that person, and in some ways cannot reconcile the actions or behavior I exhibited.  We are all facing some difficult challenges and we all know how this can cause us to react in ways that might seem harsh or intolerant.   We have all been there, so I do ask folks to please think twice before making a comment that might be taken wrongly, and at the same time, please think twice before taking offense at a comment.

Comment by Tildyc on June 29, 2015 at 8:50pm

Thank you for standing up for us Trina. I truly appreciate it.

Comment by Trina Mamoon on June 29, 2015 at 2:32pm

Peace to you. Thanks again.

Comment by Trina Mamoon on June 29, 2015 at 2:24pm

If you are sincerely apologizing, then apology accepted.

Your suggestion sounded like a sarcastic remark. Because what you suggested is impossible to do. The members here are all scattered all over the US. And even if we lived in the same small tow, it still wouldn't be possible. We would have to give up our jobs and other obligations. We would have to buy a huge house. Who would finance the purchase of such a house? And our numbers are always growing. Not all at plausible. So you see how we may have perceived your suggestion as an insult? Anyway, as i said, if you are sincere, apology accepted. Thank you.

Comment by bluebird on June 29, 2015 at 2:19pm

PotatoLord,
I didn't find your comment offensive at all. but I'm not sure George does, either....do we know if he was even speaking about you?

Comment by Trina Mamoon on June 29, 2015 at 2:10pm

To All Fellow Members,

I am thankful for this forum because this is one safe place where we can turn for moral support and understanding. Many of us have faced dismissive responses from people who have not walked in our shoes who have made light of our suffering and mede suggestions on how to heal that are ludicrous. Having this site to come to when I am sad and depressed has helped save me from going down further into depression. So a big Thank You to all of you for your strength of character and compassion. You are able to hear about other people's pain and grief even when you yourself are deep into it. Hang in there, all of you. And may peace come to us when we least expect it.

Comment by Trina Mamoon on June 29, 2015 at 2:04pm

No one on this forum has the right to be insensitive or rude to the other members just because they are in pain and grieving. This forum is for supporting bereaved spouses and partners. If anyone takes a sarcastic tone and tries to be dismissive of us trying to cope with our loss then they have no clue of what this forum is about. It's about compassion, understanding, and support. When Jon-Paul Ackerman created this forum that's what he was trying to achieve: to bring some measure of peace to the members. There is no room here for sarcasm and dismissive remarks. I don't want to come to a site where I have coming for sympathy and support find questionable comments and sentiments expressed. We need to show respect to all of us. We all follow that basic rule.

Comment by George H on June 29, 2015 at 9:15am

I truly don't believe the girl gets it at all

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