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Comment by Rachel Lynn Schuler on November 22, 2011 at 3:57am

im missing my mom....its so hard still....still so unfair her tragic death....the hoidays are hard, but i have a wonderful man to share it with now and she would be so happy....i know she is watching over me....i wish that cancer could be eliminated from the planet for good...much love to u all this holiday....let us keep banding together.....

Comment by Rachel Lynn Schuler on November 22, 2011 at 3:55am

ur not crazy laura

Comment by Laura Salefski on November 22, 2011 at 12:05am

Melissa, I am so thankful someone doesn't think I am crazy. Jon is here all the time. One night I went in to take a bath and there was a cigarette butt in the tub. I don't smoke, only Jon did. I have been crazy looking for something, in a dream Jon tells me where it is. I truly believe your mother was at the birthday party. She didn't want to miss it. She will be very proud of you for cooking your first turkey. Starting new traditions. It's going to be hard for all of us trying to get through the holidays, but with each others support it might make it just a bit easier.

Comment by Melissa Broome on November 21, 2011 at 11:56pm

Laura S,

My mom has visited me as well. I feel her presence.. And she comes to me in dreams..Or when your half asleep. My sons Birthday is the 26th of April. Mom passed the 7th Just a few weeks before. We had his party outside rented a huge bounce house. and my brother and some other ppl took Pics I was looking at some of them I swear in one of the pics it looks like my moms shadow in the window. She passed at my mother in laws house. I used to live there. I'm gonna look through the other pics we took that day. This will be our first Thanksgiving without my mom too. But I think she will be proud of me for baking my first turkey!

I'm sorry his family has not contacted you. Maybe it's hard on her..You guys were together a long time. I have a hard time seeing my step father now..It's like where is my mom she's supposed to be with you!!! yah know? anyways I dunno. Take care alright,

Melissa

Comment by Laura Salefski on November 21, 2011 at 10:53pm

Melissa, I kind of believe it was Jon visiting. He has actually visited me many times in my dreams. Sometimes it is not even a dream. It's a feeling. Like he has just climbed over me to get to his side of the bed, which he always did in life. I've seen him standing next to the bed looking over me. It's like I have said before. I feel his presence all the time. Maybe I am imagining it, but I don't really believe I am. This will be my first Thanksgiving without Jon. It was his favorite holiday. Between turkey and football it was a day made just for him. It's strange, I have had several invites for Thanksgiving dinner, but not from his mother. I was her daughter in law for almost 25 years. She has not called me since before his death. I have always called her, but not in the last 9 months. I guess our relationship died with her son. It is so hard to keep moving forward without him.

Comment by Melissa Broome on November 21, 2011 at 9:58pm

@ Laura S,

Very well could have been Jon Paying you a visit. Or maybe he's sending you a message of some sort.

Comment by Jeanne Potter on November 21, 2011 at 4:21pm

Today is Harry's birthday and I can't help remembering that last year on this day I rushed over to NYC Sloan Kettering to spring him out of the hospital to get him home for a little family party. He wanted to come home so much. I knew it would his last birthday with us and it made all that much more important to bring him home. It would be his last hospitalization and on Dec. 7th he went on hospice. He stayed at home as both of us wanted for him. I was so glad I was able to take care of him and have him at home with me. So Happy Birthday Harry, love and miss you forever. Jeanne

Comment by Cynthia Horacek on November 21, 2011 at 10:45am

Dear Jan -

Thank you so much for posting this poem.  I am very familiar with it as I remember it from when I worked for Hospice, over 10 years ago, long before I thought my husband would one day be a hospice patient himself.  The anniversary of his death was Nov. 12, and the holidays are hard around here.  This is will be my second Thanksgiving without him; I have no plans, no invitations from anyone to join them in their homes, and my daughter and her family are going out of town.  And that's okay; I think I'd just as soon be alone as have to keep my feelings in check if I was around people.  But I digress.  Thank you for the poem.  It's one of my favorites.

Comment by Rachel Lynn Schuler on November 21, 2011 at 4:12am

its still heart wrenching to think of my mom and what she went thru....its especially hard during the holidays....cancer is a bear....it claimed both of my parents....im glad i had the time with both my parents that i did, but wish i had had more with my mom, still to this day hard to believe she is gone....my heart goes out to everyone battling their losses....im so very sorry

Comment by Laura Salefski on November 21, 2011 at 3:47am

I just woke up to the overwhelming smell of of cigarette smoke. In my dream it was a man from the Lutheran church Jon's mother belongs too. I don't even know this man. My husband Jon was a 2 pack a day smoker, could it have been him visiting?

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