Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Theresa on July 5, 2012 at 12:52pm

Hi Jamie,

I'm 20 and lost both of my parents when I was young. I lost my dad at 12 and my mom at 15. The actual deaths, I've dealt with - but the harder part is dealing with the constant void in my life. I'm an only child so I don't really have anyone that I can relate to, which also makes it more lonely. Your parents would want you to continue your life, not get stuck in the grief. They'll be with you for your wedding, though not the way you want. It gets easier, I promise. If you need anything, I'm truly here for you, please don't hesitate.

Lots of love and Luck,

Theresa

Permalink Reply by Jamie Maggiacomo on July 5, 2012 at 12:56pm

I understand.  I have a brother.  But we aren't close.  I wish we were.  But he is struggling so bad.  He can't share any emotions and we live far away from each other.  It is hard because you loose a part of yourself and your identity.  You loose those people who think the world of you.  There is no longer anyone would loves you no matter what and always believes in you.

Permalink Reply by Theresa on July 5, 2012 at 12:59pm

that's very true. My dad's family (his 2 brothers and his mother) were a decent support system when he passed away but they quickly stopped trying and it sent me into a depression. they were over-compensating for my losses and then just dropped it, when all i wanted was for them to love me for who I am (instead of loving me because I was all they had left of my dad). To them, I'll never just be me, and for that, I feel totally alone.

Permalink Reply by Jamie Maggiacomo on July 5, 2012 at 1:06pm

Yeah my dad's brother is very nice to me.  They always try to reach out to me.  But it is almost like it is because they feel obligated.  I know they love me, but it is not the same. I am at Christian and I know that I have God, and am not ALL alone, but I just wish I had them hear on earth.  I always try and remember that I will see them again.  But sometimes I don't feel like being strong.  Even though everyone thinks I am.

Permalink Reply by Theresa on July 5, 2012 at 1:12pm

I agree with a lot of that; the feeling like an obligation or wanting to be strong all the time. But the key is to allow yourself to feel those emotions; to be able to cry or miss them, because if you don't, you'll probably never come to terms with it. you're entitled to all your feelings and it's important to the energy of your mind and body that you express them.

Permalink Reply by Jamie Maggiacomo on July 5, 2012 at 1:18pm

I know.  I have come to terms with my dad, but not my mom.  It's like I don't want to.  But I love talking about them.  But I always feel like I am bothering people.

Permalink Reply by Brette Stinson on July 14, 2012 at 7:29am

You and I are in the same boat and I did not think there was anybody out there that would understand my hurt because I am getting married next year and I don't have that parental support. And this goes for me having children as well. I just feel so lost. Talk to you later.