Michael, can you hear me? I need help and a push in the right direction. Is that allowed from Heaven? Losing you wasn't bad enough but now I am faced with losing the house, the business and my sanity. Help me! The family is counting on me to pull through.

I can't keep teetering on the brink of insanity. God please hold me up and give me guidance to get through all of this. The feeling of lonliness is overwhelming me and I am afraid that I don't have the strength to get through this.

Michaels best friend came to me the other day and told me that he has been having thoughts of suicide - that hurt me so much to see that pain in his face. He said he could tell me that because he knows that I have thought of it too. God please don't let us get to that point.

I know that Michael doesn't want any of us to hurt this bad. Please Michael help us all if you can. That is what you would do when you were alive - help - you helped everyone even when they didn't ask for help.

I love you no matter what. I will love you forever and I know I will see you again one day in Heaven.