I read everyones posts on here, and alot of people are just wraught with pain and sadness months, years after their loved one passes. I find for me, that my sadness comes and goes in spurts. It makes me wonder if there is something wrong with me. I think about my father often...but only when I see pictures or think of his upcoming death anniversary is when I cry...as I write this I have tears streaming down my face because I just happened to look at his picture on my facebook. I guess in a way it is still unbelievable to me that he is gone. I keep myself busy with video games, the kids, cleaning the house, and I guess I don't really take the time to cry and feel the pain. But for a week after I found out he had passed I cried and cried and cried...I think that was enough for me. I find shutting off my emotions is easier, I suppose. I know people say that isnt healthy for you, but its the way I cope.