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Comment by Lise M. on August 18, 2014 at 5:58pm

Hey there Kim- I understand in part that horrible feeling of emptiness.  You said- no-one comes around anymore (and how it hurts).  I understand that too.  I became very withdrawn caring for my mother- it's all I had time for but now my days and nights are very empty and it does hurt.  I felt almost punished for being the good daughter but I know it's just the pain talking.  

Now I'm having to force myself to get up and about.  I force myself to get exercise and I feel better- maybe not great but definitely better.  I push myself to take long walks in the park, I force myself to observe nature and write (or draw) what I see- because it's outside myself.  What is inside is too unbearable.  

I force myself to enroll in art classes or go to fairs, outdoor markets, live performances...  In general, I force myself to interact.  Slowly, it feels better.  I'm not better, not by a long shot but I haven't taken charge of my life for much too long- my grief has taken charge of me.  I'm still going through the motions of living but I do feel slightly better when I do.  Maybe next week I'll feel a little more (instead of less) and so on...  I don't know what else to do and I've already tried nothing.