I baked  mini peach pies the other day, today I baked dark fudge chocolate cup cakes with butter cream iceing. my husband ken said  wow nice  who are you baking all that for, with out even thinking I said, for shawn, he will love this. when I realized what I had said my heart dropped. shawn loves my baking,  dear god I miss my baby so much, I love him  more then life.  trying so hard to keep busy but its not working, every thing I do and did  is for shawn,  I felt shawn touch my arm today, I know hes here, does he know im hurting so bad, does he know I want to die so bad.  does he know I just cant go on with out him?  I need my son to help me, I need him to come home, please take me to him, it hurts so bad,