Oh man, so much at once... My stomach is in knots, I'm always on the verge of tears. I don't want this to be real, I just don't want this to be real. On the outside I still maintain a positive attitude and good work ethic and I try to bring that inward, but I'm collapsing inside. 

Yesterday I was asked to help make a page for my brother in the yearbook. We were in all the same classes since kindergarten, but I left our old school after he died. His empty chair was next to me…