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Comment by Vasanthi S on September 6, 2013 at 6:36am

Such a beautiful share Connie-- it is also so very timely..the person I will share my life with is now in India and we are having very 'sacred' and special times together... at the same time my son not being here haunts me--after reading what you shared it is exactly what I needed to feel I am not wrong in following my heart-- I have shared it on my fb wall too...till the 25th I will be with Craig, and once he gets back to the States, soon I will follow-- planning to meet up with the ogs group and will arrange something for sure-- will take about 4,5 months but we are all here as long as we live--Jane I draw a lot of inspiration from you-- thank you for being what u r so that others like me draw strength and try n go on.. love to all

Comment by Connie K on September 4, 2013 at 5:24pm

Hi everyone. Thanks for your support as always. Jane - volunteering will absolutely help. That's really what we're here for is to love one another and help one another. I know that while you are giving of yourself your child will be with you. And i know it is easier said than done. Good luck to you with that. I wanted to share something that was posted on the "Tips for coping with Grief" group by Martha if ya'll didn't see it.

“Grief can destroy you --or focus you. You can decide a relationship was all for nothing if it had to end in death, and you alone. OR you can realize that every moment of it had more meaning than you dared to recognize at the time, so much meaning it scared you, so you just lived, just took for granted the love and laughter of each day, and didn't allow yourself to consider the sacredness of it. But when it's over and you're alone, you begin to see that it wasn't just a movie and a dinner together, not just watching sunsets together, not just scrubbing a floor or washing dishes together or worrying over a high electric bill. It was everything, it was the why of life, every event and precious moment of it. The answer to the mystery of existence is the love you shared sometimes so imperfectly, and when the loss wakes you to the deeper beauty of it, to the sanctity of it, you can't get off your knees for a long time, you're driven to your knees not by the weight of the loss but by gratitude for what preceded the loss. And the ache is always there, but one day not the emptiness, because to nurture the emptiness, to take solace in it, is to disrespect the gift of life.” 
― Dean Koontz, Odd Hours

Comment by Michelle H on September 4, 2013 at 12:34pm

Jane, you're definitely not the only one who is putting in time. I imagine most of us feel that way.

Comment by Jane P on September 4, 2013 at 9:46am

I am starting a volunteer position this coming Monday. I am trying to give of myself. Maybe it will help. A little.

Comment by Jane P on September 4, 2013 at 9:43am

It's good to know I'm not the only one putting in time.

Comment by Jane P on September 4, 2013 at 9:40am

Thank you all

Comment by Teresa D. on September 4, 2013 at 7:15am

This is such a hard road for all of us.   I want to be able to think of Michael without the pain.  I want to remember his life more then his death.  But right now I still I don't know what to do or how to do it.  And I too every night tell Michael I'm another day closer to him down that river to the other shore.    

My daughter is here spending time with me before she leaves to Maylasia.  I didn't mean to but I broke down on her yesterday. Today I'm going to change channels and take her shopping to get some things for her trip.  I really feel like telling her to get to her room and not to come out of it.  But.....I don't think that will work.

Vasanthi, Connie, & Jane my heart goes out to all of you.   

 

 

Comment by Vasanthi S on September 4, 2013 at 2:51am

Connie, Jane, I know exactly what you mean by putting in time.... i too lost my only child and as such everything seems very unreal now, and Michelle , yes it is So Hard but the only choice now is to somehow be of use to others- that may give some solace

Comment by Connie K on September 4, 2013 at 12:00am

I understand all of it Jane. I am sorry for your loss. It was 9 months for me this weekend also. I lost my only child. Not sure why I am here now but keep seeking and having faith as hard as it is. Prayers to everyone.

Comment by Jane P on September 3, 2013 at 12:34pm

I have no choice but to stick around!

I believe Danielle is in Heaven, working for God.

Which means there IS a Heaven.

Which means I cannot "leave"

Until Heaven calls for me.

As much as I want to "leave", I could never do it.

That would be a lot of hurt I would be causing others, and I never want anyone to suffer the unbearable pain we are all living.

 

 

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