Why does everyone say that things will get easier?

I don't understand why people keep telling me that things are going to get easier when people ask me how I am like a friend of mine that I've been friends with for over 30 years she lost her husband 10 years ago and she tells me that things are going to get easier and I tell her no things are harder and harder and harder every day the sadness is overwhelming how in the world is anything going to get easier and she says it will with time maybe for her but not for me not ever

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Permalink Reply by dream moon JO B on November 29, 2016 at 3:41pm

yep i no

i no u dnt get ovr it it will hrut for evr i no all i no u hav 2 liv wif it wish i no so hrd 

Permalink Reply by Jeffery Romenesko on November 29, 2016 at 3:59pm
someone said to me once that you never get used to it and this is just the new normal. I hate that saying it sounds so complete and over but I can't seem to get it out of my head
Permalink Reply by kathleen akin on November 29, 2016 at 4:29pm

Pamela, sounds like you are not coping very well. It's hard to do. Have you seen a therapist, or counselor? It feels like such a lot of work, but overall I think you could possibly find a way to cope.

I know...that doesn't sound like much of a life..  coping.  Sounds like something I wouldn't want. But I think that is where "it gets easier in time" comes from. You learn to cope with what was pushed onto you. Every time I do something around the house that I've never done before because Rocky always did all that, I'm pretty proud of myself and my ability to cope with that thing improves. I'm not so scared as I was before.

I'm no expert, you just sound so overwhelmed. And you are! People here know what you are going through though, so keep posting and reading.

Kathy Akin

Permalink Reply by Pamela philipp on November 29, 2016 at 4:39pm
No I'm not coping very well it's been since September of 2015 my mom passed September 6th and my husband September 14th so it's been a Little over a year and coping has gotten more real and a lot harder because the numbness has worn off and now the reality sets in so for me things getting easier is never going to happen but thank you for your kind words anyway I do appreciate it
Permalink Reply by annjulie on December 7, 2016 at 12:46am

Hi pamela my mom passed oct30/2016 and my boyfriend 5 days later nov4/2016 maybe we could help each other ive been trying to find someone in my same position wishing you lots of love and strength msg me if you want to chat sometime

Permalink Reply by dream moon JO B on November 29, 2016 at 4:54pm

sisne 2012 multi loss 2013 loss 2014 loss 2-15 loss 2016 loss loss my fur kid wish wz grt frind ovr 16 yrs of frndshp i had pepe say she wz only a cat yea but my cat it dnt tell me way is huf feal wen my dad died thn loss so mush loss in 2012 thn 2013 2014 2015 2016 thn lst wk my fur kid lst tue i spt al nite sobin ovr her i s did sad 2 say only 1 it unstood my loss wz my cat she did nevr tld me 2 get f@@@k ovr it lk iv had off pepel 1s its nt had a loss 1s its not had loss seam 2 tell us way we feal thy do

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