7 months ago I lost my baby sister to an accidental over dose..... I found out she passed when I was 5 months pregnant..... The coroner called me and told me and I hit me knees and started to have contractions.... From that point on I knew I was not going to be able to grieve like everyone else... Well 3 months ago I started my grieving process and I went pretty fast through denial but I think I am mixing anger and depression. I am sad all the time and that makes me so angry!!!! But only because I have a 3 month old son and this sadness seems to taking up all my energy..... My husband says I am starting to scare him..... I love him for trying to comfort me but he just doesn't understand..... I know it hurts him that he can't help me but I just don't know what to do.

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I had my daughter 2 weeks ago she is doing well but I'm still so depressed :( It feels so wrong her not being here I just cnt believe it I miss her so much do u think u would see a medium :( I think I want to go but worried she may not come through I also believe in god and believe she is in heaven and your not ment to contact sprints but I need contact :( x x
I know I wish they would :( x

This Thursday will make 7mths I havent's talk to her and lost her. I just realize that i have going straight for rock bottom and part of me don't care. The other wants to try to stop it, but i feel so weak and tired. The life in me has drained out. My source of strength is gone. I keep trying to figure a way to deal with my sister being gone. But i just don't know how to and not sure if i want to know. I AM ANGRY, MAD, PISSED OFF, TIRED, BEATEN, CONFUSED, FRUSTRATED, AND I WANT TO KNOW WHY???!!!!! I just miss my sister so much!!!!!!

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