soon the holidays will be here , my heart hurts so much. to go through Christmas without you kills me. its now just another day. I ask every night what you want me to do, and no answer, to hear  MOM from you would be such a gift and I hope I hear it one more time. all day I think of holding you, trying to remember how it feels. my chest hurts to breathe, my tears burn, ill wait for you to come to me, and pray to you each night that its soon,  my love my life my son, forever mom