everyday I ask god the same questions over and over.  when will my tears stop? when will I smile again? when will the pain go away? when will my heart stop hurting so bad?  when will you let me hold my son again, see his smile, hear his beautiful voice?  and over and over again I get  NO  answer,  why are we left to suffer so bad, when he knows im ready to go to. does my son hear me crying everyday? does he know im dieing without him? I cant remember not being in pain any more, it just hurts each and everyday, im so dam tired, why wont he answer me why?