I want to say I am grateful for the comments I have been getting, and that I really do appreciate them. I have tried to reply a few times and I just kind of get stuck.  I have been reading other peoples posts and its "nice" to read that at least some others out there understand some of the things that I feel, not that I WANT other people to feel this way.. but it's a small comfort. I want to respond to some of the posts, and be involved in the threads, but I have a hard time offering advice that really hasn't worked for me, and other times I feel that my post would be less than optimistic and I don't want to depress anyone that is already depressed, and grieving.  

I guess I am just hesitant right now, and writing is helping me confront my feelings.