I read a post on another site that made me think about something in a way that I forgot that I had already done with someone else.

When my husband died, I went to my therapist and among a few other questions, he asked me how I was doing.  I told him, of course, I was very upset, but I'd had a wonderful husband and a wonderful marriage.  He seemed a bit concerned, which I know he was thinking I was idolizing.  But, I told him yes, my husband and I had our ups and downs.  We had times…

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You know...I trusted you, Mom.  I'm not sure why I didn't see it before, to be honest.  I don't understand how you could do that to your own son!  Your children.  How?  Why?

I remember you telling me not to tell your side of the family anything that went on with my brother.  Just to tell them that he's fine or I don't know.  I was like in 3rd grade when you did that. …

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Sometimes I look at the last few days or weeks and see separate, distinctive beliefs, feelings, wants, etc. Like having different personalities. No, I'm not schizophrenic.



One part of me wails and screams and sobs uncontrollably for my husband because I am so empty without him. There is no peace in that part of me. Another part has an unwavering faith. A wordless knowledge and complete understanding of all the reasons why, how, where, what... There is faith and peace within this part… Continue