Since mom died I have felt that I'm just existing. I can relate to many posts I have read in here, that describe how people feel empty, like a shell of what they used to be, just going through the motions, etc.

 I don't really do anything meaningful these days. I go to work, I eat, sleep and breathe. I'm living because I have a body that's still working, but nothing else. Now I don't have anyone to take care of or anyone to take care of me.

It feels sometimes that I could…

Yesterday I dreamt about you Mom, you were in bed as in your last days here, but maybe you weren't sick you were just waking up. It wasn't our apartment, but a different one with a nice view. I said hello to you and you replied ''Hello Daughter''. Then I got nervous because I knew I hadn't seen you in so long so I told you I loved you. You told me you loved me too. I can't remember anything else. Getting up today wasn't so awful as it usually is.

 It's weird Mom, for the last day or…