Cindi B
  • 41, Female
  • Katy, TX
  • United States
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About Me:
I'm 27 and moved with my boyfriend to Texas a little over a year ago. I'm an only child with one thriving maternal grandmother who helped my widowed mother raise me in a small town in Illinois. We'd only been in Texas a few months when Mom's heart stopped the first time and it was a year of back and forth until she just couldn't fight anymore. Now I'm back in Texas feeling more and more alone everyday.
About my Loss:
After a year of one health complication after another my mother passed away at 58 on July 30th, 2011 from CHF. It still seems so unreal. We were always a team, and now I'm all alone and in a new town and with no one to talk to about it, not that I'm all that great at talking about what's bothering me.

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Cindi B's Blog

Almost 7 Months

 It's been almost 7 months since I lost my Mom. Sometimes I still can't believe I haven't talked with her in so long, and that I never will again. Being so far from home has made it easier to pretend that she's back home and fine. I don't know if I'll ever be able to accept that she's really gone forever. I feel like my life is still on pause and I have no idea where to go from here.I wish I could talk to my Mom about this. She always knew what to say.

 I still have a lot of…

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Posted on January 23, 2012 at 12:55pm

Yet Another Wave

Once again I feel a mess. I had a few really good days, and then yesterday I woke up feeling raw and sad. It's still lingering on today. Sometimes I wonder if it will always be like this. Start feeling like my old self and then  *Boom* back to feeling like I did the day it happened. I just want to lay on the couch and not move. The thought of showering seems too strenuous. What kind of life is that?…

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Posted on November 8, 2011 at 3:37pm — 4 Comments

Writting What I Can't Say Aloud

 

It's been almost 15 weeks since my Mom passed away.

I have so many thoughts constantly running through my head. Some days I feel crazy. I can't, or don't talk about what I'm feeling. To anyone. No one understands, so why worry or burden them with my horror stories? Which is what my life feels like; One big never ending horror…

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Posted on October 11, 2011 at 6:45pm — 1 Comment

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My Fathers Loss

Many years ago, I lost my father after his battle with colon cancer that later spread to his bones. The grief stayed with me longer than I expected. Ambrosia Behavioral Health helped me work through that loss, understand my emotions, and find healthier ways to cope and move forward. https://www.ambrosiatc.comSee More
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"Professional help gives you a safe space to talk, understand your emotions, and learn healthy ways to cope. It can make grief feel less overwhelming and easier to manage over time. https://www.ambrosiatc.com"
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Traumatic loss of an only child

I started this group so that people who have lost their only child or the only child that remained, as in my case, could come together because I believe people that did have a child or children who now have none have special issues.
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Loss of a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide

If you have lost a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide please share your story or feelings here. Share the love and beauty of the one you lost. Losing someone any of these ways is not natural and can be hard to understand and ask why? I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago. She also suffered from major depression. Her doctor got her hooked on pain medication and she was addicted most of my life. These doctors who were suppose to help her ended up killing her in the end. I also…See More
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Karen R. replied to Entony's discussion Movies about grief that actually understand loss — any recommendations?
"So sorry!💔💔💔💔💔"
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