Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Losing Someone to Cancer
This is for anyone who has lost somone to cancer. I lost my adopted Mom to breast cancer some years ago. She was everything I could have asked for. She loved me because I was just me. She also loved my family and children as if they were her own.
Completely Lost
I lost my best friend of 21 years on the 17th of April, he had metastasized lung cancer after fighting for 2 years and surviving odds 3 times. He did not just not wake up, he fought to the very last second. He was at the hospice house, he was fighting o get out of the bed till the very last second, he was suffocating due to the fluid in his lung and kept looking at me to help him. There was nothing I could do, the nurses at the hospice were giving him the Meds to help calm him down, but nothing worked. He finally laid back and it was over. How do I get over the guilt I feel, how is it I have to stay? How do I get past watching him struggle like he did over and over in my head? How do I get past feeling like I let him down? I keep hearing people talk about how their loved one came back to let them know they were ok, why hasn't he come back to me? Why doesn't this heart wrenching pain go away or at least become less so I feel like I can function?
I realize there are most likely no answers to my question but I really feel I am going to spend the rest of my days looking for something that is nit there. Maybe I am going through what I was meant to.
I realize there are most likely no answers to my question but I really feel I am going to spend the rest of my days looking for something that is nit there. Maybe I am going through what I was meant to.
Shirley Thompson
Carma, for a while there I was feeling I had to stay here just to make sure everyone got buried. I take care of his elderly aunt and his parents all of whom are in their late seventies. I feel guilty thinking I'll find enjoyment in something and Jimmy comes back to my mind and I start thinking about all he went through and my circle starts all over again. I do understand where you are coming from.
May 25, 2016
kathleen akin
I know what you mean Shirley Thompson, about wanting them to come and see you in dreams. I actually made Rocky promise me that he would. As if even he could control this. One of my cousins said that somewhere in scripture it says that he has to get permission from God. I never knew this, so I don't know.
It must feel so bad to go over and over the last moments of your loved ones death, and have that death be such a struggle. That would be awful. I would not handle that well. Rocky died pretty quick and it seemed like he didn't struggle at all. He looked shock and amazed, but not in pain or sadness. It looked as if he was looking at something, and I kept getting in his face and asking him "what do you see???" and he would look around me. He was something and was more interested in that than me. I keep wondering if it was his mom, or dad or someone he was close to, come get him and take him through the veil. I hope that is it.
I'm sure you loved one knows your heart, and that you wanted to help him. That you suffered right along with him.
Dec 12, 2016
Pamela philipp
Dec 26, 2016