My daughter---sudden loss

Hi, I just joined the group today, dealing with this is so hard and even more concerned with my wife. We suddenly lost my daughter on December 27th, she was only 18 years old. We went to go wake her up from the night before and when my wife tried she was already gone, we were told she passed in her sleep because we found her with her eyes closed. It is the worse feeling in the world to lose your child, it was so unexpected, she had no health issues (well besides asthma but it wasn’t bad) was perfectly fine when she went to bed the night before, I just don’t understand why this happened.  My wife is not taking it well at all, which is expected but I wish there is more that I can do for her, I feel that I am not, don’t want to say the wrong things or make her more upset. She writes to my daughter every chance she gets on her Facebook page, which I think helps her a lot but some of it makes me feel like I don’t exist. We also have a son (he is 14) and keeps us busy but a lot of times it sounds like no one else isd around to support her. I really don’t know what I am looking for here , we have tried a few support groups but wasn’t what we were looking for. We found another one and mentioned to her a few times about going but never do.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Ken Ciolek on July 25, 2010 at 9:44pm
Hi Jodi, i sent u an email, reply back when you can.
Permalink Reply by Ken Ciolek on July 25, 2010 at 5:36am
Hi Jodi

I am so sorry for your loss and have an isea what you are dealing with,maybe we can help each other, if you like contact me directly at kciolek@optonline.net and we can talk more.
Permalink Reply by Jodi Denton on July 25, 2010 at 6:17am
Hi Ken,
I think the death of your daughter sounds very close to what happened to me and I would like to talk to you if I may. I would love for you to contact me at JSLD68@aol.com if you can. I really need help and I hope I can bring some kind of comfort even though I cant comfort myself riht now.
Permalink Reply by Crystal M on August 14, 2010 at 4:55pm
My niece passed away almost 3 years ago. My sister and brother-in-law went to a place called compassionate friends. That was the best thing for them. It helped them alot with communication. They are divorced now, not because of my niece passing, but because of my sister's drug use which started after they lost my niece. I went to a meeting with them, and those people know exactly what you are going through. It is for parents who lost children, and this is unlike any group that they tried. Look up the compassionate friends in your neighborhood, and encourage your wife to go. I don't know what you guys are going through, but I know that my brother-in-law actually talks about Issy now without crying. My sister seemed to be getting better, but I think that the drugs have over taken her. They met friends there, and they have picnics and baloon releases for their children. It would give your wife somewhere to go and something to do. I hope that things get better for your family, I will be praying for you.

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