Comment

Comment by Katherine Ellis on May 18, 2009 at 7:40am

Oh Gail. Thank you for putting into words what we all feel and think, even though this had to come from your own deep dark pain. Not a good day for me because it's Irene's birthday. I wrote in the blog/journal, did it help? Not today. The sun may be out but it's dark inside. Lots of tears flooding here.

Comment by Gail Richardson on May 17, 2009 at 6:37am

A Shade of Sadness. ♥


In comes the darkness to my soul
even as I sit in the early morning sun,
the distant sounds of the living
seem far removed from the fogginess of my mind.
♥
In the stillness of the house
which seems quieter than quiet,
time seems to pass too slowly.
♥
A feeling of being outside myself
looking back into an empty shell
of the person I used to be.
♥
I cry for my former self.
That person I once liked and enjoyed.
She is gone.
A loss within a loss, within a loss.
♥
A heaviness in my heart,
the weight of a million tears.
Drowning my emotions,
mixing and swirling in a pool of despair.
Ugly hateful despair.
♥
A sadness so deep and heavy
leaving the body tired and used,
I feel I could sleep,
sleep for a thousand years and never wake up.
♥
A thousand years will not change a thing.
You would still not be here.
What to believe, I don't know.
I just don't know. My soul is lost.
♥
I know not which way to turn.
Where to look,
♥
I feel helpless,
helpless to help my self,
annoyed with the daily things of life I must do.
♥
I don't care, not anymore.
The world could fall upon it's knees
it would not matter,
I am too shrouded in the darkness of my world
that spins ever out of control,
directing my emotions
with no warning as to what feelings
will be brought upon me next.
♥
There is guilt, another weight to bear.
Those who are with me, who I love and love me,
they need me, but I am not ready.
I hold them back at arms length,
I am not ready,
their demands draw on what strength I have left.
For that I am sorry,
but I cannot help bringing on the emotional distance.
There is a need to protect myself,
but from what I am not sure.
♥
There is anger.
Anger that occasionally swells within me.
There is no direction into which to fling this anger.
It is a new and different type of anger
not one I am familiar with and it disturbs me.
It makes me afraid.
♥
I try to be strong. For you, and only you.
I try to think what you would have me do.
♥
I know you would want me to live my life.
To continue on. It is not an easy task, not at all.
♥
Some days I can go out
and meet the world with vigor and say I do this for you.
♥
Some days I must crawl into my shell
and hide from the world that has been so cruel to me.
I am trying.
♥
The days are filled with thoughts of you,
and should I find myself not thinking of you,
I gasp for fear that I am forgetting you.
♥
I have learned to value life, you have taught me this.
To see the beauty in each day given to me,
even through this veil of sad darkness.
I know it is there waiting for me.
♥
Someday the sadness will lift
and I will only think of you
with a smile and warmness in my heart.
My love for you will always be there
that shall never pass
and I hope somehow you know this too.
♥
Your memory is only a heartbeat away.
I shall always love,
I shall always long for you,
I shall always wish to have you back.
And I shall live -- if only for you.



♥ By Donna Mae Scuncio. ♥

Comment by Ann Edmondson on May 16, 2009 at 10:43am

Gail~that web sit was awsome. Such inspiring words. Thank you

Comment by Gail Richardson on May 15, 2009 at 11:10am

http://www.thepastwhispers.com/My_Friend.html

Check this out - it is beautiful xx

Comment by Gail Richardson on May 15, 2009 at 11:07am

It would be great if we could start some sort of calendar of special dates - that way we can make sure that we reach out to those who need it most and let them know we are all thinking of them and their Angels

Katherine - I know exactly where you are coming from - Meshael's dates are both in June and I am already dreading the days. This morning I saw a little girl who looked so much like MEshael when she was tiny - I did a double turn! It hurts! Bless you and sending healing light and love to all here xx

Comment by Katherine Ellis on May 15, 2009 at 8:40am

Hi Ann. Irene's birthday is Monday, May 18th. She would be 35. Some years are better than others. This one seems to be an awful hard one. As I climb to it each day is getting harder to get though. Thanks for asking Ann

Comment by Ann Edmondson on May 14, 2009 at 11:14am

Katherine~ when exactly is Irene's Birthday? I will b sure and say and extra prayer for you that day. Seems the birthdays are hard for us.

Comment by Katherine Ellis on May 13, 2009 at 2:55pm

Hey Ann~ Getting close to Irene's birthday. Feel like I'm going down hill. That is so great your having a good day!!!

Comment by Ann Edmondson on May 12, 2009 at 3:29pm

Hi Katherine. How are you doing today? Me-- today is a good day.

Comment by Katherine Ellis on May 12, 2009 at 5:54am

I already sent a message. Hi Ann, Gail, Robert, Janna & Karen. Great poem!!

• ‹ Previous
• 1
• …
• 754
• 755
• 756
• 757
• Next ›
• Page