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Comment by Lorraine on January 4, 2012 at 7:58pm

Adrianne, I have read "Many Lives, Many Masters" by Brian Weiss and it gave me comfort; it is written by a psychiatrist who did not believe in past life, but was given much reason to believe; so it is scientific in a way, which I like.  I do think whatever brings comfort, be it Compassionate Friends meetings, online support, mediums, church, books on the afterlife or holding onto your child's belongings; this should be respected and treasured as a moment of peace is so hard to find some days.  

Comment by Grace on January 4, 2012 at 7:28pm

No I just say that you may have been praying to go to Ft Collins but Gods Un answered Prayer for you was to Put your Wife in the place she needed to be so you would meet her and have a wonderful Love and Marriage and family.... You were praying for YOUR Plan but God had another Plan for you......  Even though right now you are missing your Danny... just remember how full your life has grown because God unanswered your prayer and gave you the Love of your wife and children..... you would not have had this broken heart... but then again you would not have had this Love either...This was Gods Greatest Gift to you....

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 6:41pm

@Grace, Are you saying my going to Ft. Collins may have produced something even more terrible? I just cannot imagine what that could have been seeing where I am in life.

Comment by Grace on January 4, 2012 at 5:28pm

'S Some of Gods greatest Gifts are Unanswered Prayers"

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 3:28pm

@Grace, don't take me wrong I love my wife and kids; they just were not part of my original life plan. I was headed to Ft. Collins, Co. for Graduate School when I met my wife. Funny how life works out?

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 3:27pm

Physical symptoms of severe stress

1. Headaches, dizziness, neck ache, back pain,

2. High blood pressure, chest pain, palpitations,

3. Heart Disease, Beware of the heart attack symptoms!

4. Frequent colds, infections,

5. Rashes, itches, hives,

6. Fatigue and constant tiredness,

7. Frequent stomach pain and heart burn.

 

Funny, only #6 applies.

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 3:25pm

Psychological Effects of stress

1. Anxiety and nervousness,

2. Insomnia, nightmares, bad dreams,

3. Difficulty in concentrating,

4. Difficulty in decision making,

5. Irritability, anger bouts,

6. Feeling of loneliness and worthlessness.

 

Yep, I got all except #4 & #5. I used to not dream; my friends just say I don't remember them before. I got them now; funny thing they are never about Danny? #6 is the worst.

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 3:21pm

Behavioral Signs of Stress

1. Social withdrawal and isolation,

2. Increase in alcohol consumption, smoking or taking drugs,

3. Excessive gambling,

4. Excessive activities like exercise and buying,

5. Loss of interest in appearance,

6. Neglect of punctuality,

7. Not taking interest in work, not feeling motivated to do anything.

8. Not sharing thoughts with others, and decrease in social interaction.

 

Yep, I got everyone of them except #2 & #3. #5 is not that I am not bathing & shaving; but I used to be a Clothes Horse, now it's a pair of jeans & a sweater/hoodie.

Comment by Grace on January 4, 2012 at 1:42pm

Well my marriage has taken a bad Beatin Dick... It is hard for me to feel like I am the only one losing my mind in grief... The rest of the people in this house seem to have it all figured out.  ... Including my 2 audult children..... and this is where I have others come in to tell me they are all grieving "Thier Own Way"....  including my husband.... however   .... I'm not feeling it with them... but boy I feel the criitics here telling me how I am just   this or that....  I have been having the Should I conversation.... Should I stay or Should I go???? Seems like no one would miss me if I were gone...  I have said how unhappy I am and to most of us you know when we talk about our kids that are dead peole like to just change the subject and act like they should just ignore us completely and maybe I will just get my mind on something else and if I just don't think about my Niles I would be just fine.     It doe not help when my husband wonders if he should have been paying more attention to Niles instead of getting our boat ready for the lake when he was drinking the water that may have helped trigger the siezure.... While I was at Wal-Mart shopping for food.    Again Dick those WHAT IFs Haunt all of us.....

f you would have never married Your right... You would not have had Danny and you would not be here.....  but then agaiin.... YOU WOULD NOT HAVE HAD DANNY..... and ALL THAT HE IS to You Now.....Hugs

Comment by Dick on January 4, 2012 at 11:01am

Bad case of "What Ifs" today, hard night as well; I'm tired now. What was the trigger since yesterday? I really need to shake it, I have not had this feeling in a while. I am having a hard time concentrating on work.

I have even regressed to my "What if I had never married?"; this was my original plan. Would I have even more regrets now, would I be happier, would I be free? I hate feeling bad.

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