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Comment by Nancy L on July 19, 2013 at 10:21pm

I so miss my mom.  There have been so many things that I have been putting off, I know I will have to face these things eventually, but I don't want to.  Thinking about them make me ill.  How do we get passed this?  There is just so much turmoil that I really feel like running away...I don't won't to deal with it.  I feel more and more depressed.  I don't show my grief to others, I keep it all nice and bottled up inside of me...I am waiting for the bottle to shatter into a million pieces.  I am so in need of a break. to get away from things.  But I can't get away from work right now.  There are just so many emotions swimming inside of me, more that usual.  Maybe one day we can look back and see how strong we all were...but right now I don't feel very strong at all. 

Comment by michael sandoval on July 18, 2013 at 10:11pm

it was one year ago today that we took my mom to the hospital.  that started her decline until her passing on sept 28th 2012.  I miss you Mommy.

Comment by Martha on July 18, 2013 at 9:22pm

Dear friends:

If you like, visit the following group, and post a comment. Something that you do that might help somebody else feel a moment of peace. Like you, I am in pain over the loss of my Mom. And, we can share with all the members here. 

Tips to help one cope with grief

Comment by Eliza on July 18, 2013 at 2:07pm

Today is my mom's birthday. Missing her a lot. I bought sunflowers because they were her favorite flower. I made a donation in her name to a cancer charity. And I am also making her favorite kind of cupcake. Trying to live and celebrate her life rather than feeling sad and down and crying. But boy, do I miss her.

Comment by Sheila B. on July 17, 2013 at 10:27am

I miss my mom more than ever. My mother in law calls constantly and it's bringing me to tears every time now. She calls more than ever and won't stop. I can't talk to my mom and it hurts. Her mother is very old and she doesn't understand how it feels. I can be fine but then it upsets me, it's like a constant reminder my mom is gone. 

Comment by Emily on July 16, 2013 at 6:20pm

Very well said Jeff R and I totally agree.

Comment by Jeff R on July 16, 2013 at 6:15pm

The path to the passing of a parent is a hard one; I see many themes in common: sickness, decline, irreversable illness, homes, doctors, caregivers, etc.  We, as their children, running ourselves ragged with stress, worry, anxiety.  Then, it all comes to an end and long for our parents, despite what we went through.  It's really incredibly hard to recenter after being through these experiences.  But, we do our best as time marches onwards. 

Comment by Sandra Nichols on July 16, 2013 at 11:31am

Nancy, we are so alike. I just want peace also. You WILL remember your mom and good memories. It will come to you. My mom went downhill for about 3 years and the last year was very very traumatic between nursing homes and homes that would not take her back, emergency centers, comas, her dementia off and on and home. I didnt think I would ever remember the good things... but i find myself smiling once in a while and even laughing at something we did together or a joke we shared. I find the ignorant people that have not been changed by death of loved ones will probably unfortunately go through what we are going through or even worse, not ever catch on  about what is really important in this life. I believe my life will be more peaceful and calm eventually than I ever was before. I am sad mom cannot see the new improved me.   

Comment by Nancy L on July 16, 2013 at 10:56am

Thank you Sandra,

I just want peace...but can't convicne others to want the same. There is more to life that what you have. I can't do anything about it. 

With my mom passing it makes me think about my own mortality. None of us are guaranteed there will be tomorrow here on earth. 

I just want to be free of all the pain, I want my mind to be free to enjoy my moms memory and to enjoy the good things in life.

 

Comment by Sandra Nichols on July 12, 2013 at 9:57am

Hi Wendy, It has been 1 1/2 years since mom died and some days I can hardly get out of bed the sadness is so intense. We also were hopgin and thought mom would make it through the cancer therapy she was one week from coming home and up and walking but the sepsis in her blood shut her organs down in 1 week or 2... I feel like we let her down by not being there the whole tinme.. Somehow we felt like she would pull through since she had pulled through before. She died feeling very sick and probably alone. I try not to think about that but, here on this site I know peopel will understand.

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