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Comment by michael sandoval on September 25, 2013 at 1:07am

My Condolences to everyone.  Yesterday was the four year anniversary of the loss of my wife Denise and Saturday will be one year anniversary of my Mom's passing.  God Bless Everyone.

Comment by Janessa M on September 25, 2013 at 12:01am

Danny, yes we lived together. It's hard being in the house, wishing I could wake up every morning and see her again.

Comment by Wendy (Boabie) on September 24, 2013 at 11:43pm

Dia, my love and prayers are with you. I lost both my parents a year and a week apart, my mom died 4 weeks ago. I'm an only child. We were together all the time. I have literally been lost w/o her, with problems working and sleeping etc. Remember you were an awesome daughter, and that should be celebrated. Her spirit & soul will be with you forever, because I believe true love never dies. Sending you a big hug!!!

Comment by Jeff R on September 24, 2013 at 5:54pm

So sorry to hear of your Mom's struggles Dia.  Life is often very tough on the elderly; I can certainly empathize.  You are fighting this battle, relentlessly at times, but you know where it's going to end and that's really, really hard to accept. Give yourself some time and remind yourself that your Mom is no longer struggling with her diseases, which is a blessing in itself.  It's going to take some time for you to feel even a little bit better now that the battle is over.

Comment by Dia -Ayesha on September 23, 2013 at 12:10pm

Hello everyone. I lost my beloved mom this july 22 under tragic circumstances. She had lupus and cardiomyopathy since more than 14 years. I was her primary caregiver. She was a wonderful person, great mother, my best friend and closest companion. I was always with her. She suffered for years with pain , diseases and other problems but was always graceful and dignified. The past year was horrendous in which she suffered a heart attack, 5 mini strokes, acute cardiac failure. In the end she passed away after contracting malaria in a hospital here in India. She was in ICU battling for her life and yet she was concerned about her family. A truly selfless person. I am devastated beyond belief. The grief is so intense. Being without her is soooo heartwrenching. Why did she suffer so much? Why was God not kind to her? My head churns with questions 24/7 and there is nobody to answer them . Everything is trivial and meaningless. She was the greatest love of my life . While she was alive there was hope. Now everything seems hopeless. I really dont wanna go on . Theres no point. I tried to do whatever made her happy. I always felt that love and devotion could heal her. Everybody tells me that I was a great daughter but I feel like I failed her . She was so unwell and unhappy in the last few weeks of her life . This haunts me all the time. She was in one of the beat hospitals here but the attitude of the callous , insensitive doctors and nursing staff haunts me. She felt alone and abandoned in the icu due to the strict rules of the hospital. I feel very guilty about this although this was not in my control.there are many things I feel i could have done differently. I want to beg for her forgiveness. I want to tell her I love and miss her so much and that life is meaningless without her. The world has come to an end for me. Somebody please help me make peace not only with her death but also with the guilt I carry within me. Help me please.

Comment by Danny on September 19, 2013 at 1:48pm

Yes Janessa it is the toughest assignment we have ever had. It does get a bit harder because the first months or so are just a state of disbelief. Did you both stay together in the same house for the past few years ?

Comment by Janessa M on September 19, 2013 at 1:31pm

It's been almost 2 months since my mom passed away. i feel like it's getting harder. I always feel like something is missing. It's so hard for me to be around the house and not have her there to say hi to. I miss her so much. This is definitely the hardest thing ive ever had to go through in my life.

Comment by Emily on September 19, 2013 at 12:58am

I'm sorry I haven't been posting on here much lately, been dealing with some other stressful stuff not all of it related to my mom's death.

Comment by Danny on September 16, 2013 at 9:07pm

Yes the sibling rivalry appears to be happening in many families and it seems to be quite common I guess even in Western countries. There is no escaping that but I'd say if one can get away for at least 4-6 months before even getting into this helps a lot.  It can help to grieve alone and get some break from the madness.

Comment by Danny on September 14, 2013 at 3:59pm

Same here.  I do my routine as best as I can but I do feel very vulnerable and miss all the conversations a lot. At this time, any stress which comes on top can make it real bad. 

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