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Comment by jill smith on December 11, 2014 at 7:43pm

Traci, I too lost my mom in October and my dad last year. It does not feel much like Christmas to me either. We always went to her house to celebrate Christmas and to not be able to do that is going to be hard. It is all hard. My emotions are all over the place...I take things day by day right now. I do not think you have to have it all figured out. It is a long road and I will always miss my mom. It breaks my heart that I have to live the rest of my life without her. She lived about 5 hours away but we talked every day. Every evening I get this urge to call her. There are parts of me still in denial and shock. So hang in there. I am trying to make other plans for Christmas too.

Comment by Traci Ann on December 11, 2014 at 6:54pm

I just lost my mom in October. I don't know how to handle this because I just got used to having holidays with out my Dad. But this year really doesn't feel like Christmas. Thanksgiving was hard but as I try to get ready for Christmas is just like I want to get it over with. I bought my mom's orament at things remember. Same place I got my dads. It was hard to put my dads on the tree but now this year was even harder to hang my mom's up this year. Plus now that I can't be home for Christmas makes even harder on me. I am so hard to figure out what I am to do or how I am to feel. 

Comment by Casey on December 10, 2014 at 7:33pm

Tans, I do have difficulty breathing; i do breathing exercises and meditation but still..I stayed up and tossed and turned in my bed and cannot sleep until early morning after i take some pills for headache...i am staying alive and not eating meat as a way to remember my mother, i know she would want me to be happy and find my own journey and path..but there is nothing more meaningful and significant than taking care of my mother and being with her. I can't do that ever again and that pains is everlasting.

Comment by Jay on December 10, 2014 at 1:55pm

Casey, you will get through. My mom passed a few weeks ago at a relatively young age. My goal is to live every day fully in honor of every day she did not get to live. That can be your purpose. <3

Comment by Danny on December 10, 2014 at 5:20am

Yes Tans is right.  The pain/grief will never really leave. Make small goals 1-2  months at a time and that is what I did for the last 12 months.  Still quite raw for me but I got a couple of things done.

Comment by Tans on December 10, 2014 at 1:44am

Just breathe and take baby steps. Don't take on too much, small pieces are ok. It will be easier to deal with

Comment by Tans on December 10, 2014 at 1:43am

Casey, I know that it's hard but you will get through this. It's been 4 years since my mom passed and we learn to take the pain with us, it never goes away though. Some days will be easier to deal with than others. Unfortunately we are still here and we have to carry on with our lives and make our mom's proud of us. 

Comment by Casey on December 9, 2014 at 7:55pm

i just dont know whats the point of my life is..

Comment by Danny on December 8, 2014 at 3:45pm

Me too had a bad day.  ITs good to keep a couple of bills running for a while if possible ie no final bills just pay the premium.

Comment by Holly on December 8, 2014 at 2:53pm

I thought I was doing well today until I checked my mailbox to discover more condolence cards and final bills of my Mums. I know the card senders mean well but it just brings all the pain flooding back in. I am having such a hard time just carrying on and i feel like I am being a terrible mother to my kids not being able to do the everyday things they depend on me for.

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