Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Amanda A. on December 1, 2011 at 1:59am

Jenny, I share this also. I am an emotional eater. I like to say food is my band aid.. You can always slap on a chocolate bar for the pain. My very good friend lost her husband to cancer also this past year. She has started running and she really enjoys it. She walks her dog alot too, she says it is nice just to get out and get fresh air, it makes her feel better. I live in the country, so there are no sidewalks for me to walk the dog, but I am thinking of getting a treadmill or something to start. I dont think its bad to have food to enjoy, because lets face it, sometimes a snickers bar is my best friend, but maybe we could all feel better about eating it if we throw in a brisk walk or something too. Trust me, I have packed on weight over the last couple of years with my moms end of life being so hard on me, and its easy to say, oh just excersise, but my friend really does say that it helps clear her head and she feels so much better when she does it. I am going to start trying to take better care of myself too, but I enjoy sweets, so giving them up is not an option for me.. dont be too hard on yourself, its only been a couple months and it takes time, I am not going to push myself too hard right now, I lost my mom sept 23, so I understand.

Permalink Reply by Kris Baclawski on December 5, 2011 at 4:05pm

Hi Jennie and Amanda: 

I'm 56; and I lost my mom back in June.  Like you, I have had the tendency to be an emotional eater since puberty leading me to believe that any problem in life could be "solved" with sweets.  (There are a lot of 5 pounds that I have accumulated over the years.)   You know already that chocolate is just a temporary fix--you're wiser than I was at the same age.  Now I go for quality of chocolate over quantity.  ;o) 

As I mourn the loss of my mother, I realize more than ever that I must "nurture" myself--take over her job, so to speak--  take care of my needs, a difficult thing for someone who has spent a lot of time doing a lot of care giving for others.  Much as I wish there were some one else to do it, I have to make the arrangements to make myself some good meals, treat myself on occasion, take a bubble bath, get myself a massage--or what ever.  

Exercising is a great stress reliever.  I have a dog who forces me to get out to walk, but I also have invested in a couple DVDs--walking w/ Leslie Sansone and Dancing with the Stars (about $10 each).  I don't have to worry if it's dark or slippery outside--I can just slip the disc in and go. 

Hope this might help,

Kris

Permalink Reply by Melissa Broome on December 5, 2011 at 4:51pm

Girls When my mom was ill I couldn't eat anything my stomach was in knots from stress after she passed..After about 3 or 4 months I started baking again for something to keep my mind busy and to remember my mom we used to cook together alot. Well I started making goodies and eating them lol I packed on 15 pounds. I go for the sweets when I'm stressed or depressed. and I am alot. oO I try and just eat one now..And I'm not baking as much..But I did make cupcakes today My son turned 5..I was bad I have ate 3 no more!!!!!!!!!!

Permalink Reply by Jenny G on December 6, 2011 at 9:37pm

Lately, my new joy is to take a nap.  I just don't really want to do much of anything.  The pain of losing my mom has become a kind of numbness. Maybe when this numbness goes away, exercise will be close by.  Thanks for the responses.  It helps to know that I'm not alone.

Permalink Reply by Becky on December 10, 2011 at 11:53am

When my grandfather died, my mother went from 5' nothin' and 95 pounds to 5' nothin' and...200 pounds. After she died, I lost all desire to eat. Three years ago, I fought tooth and nail to get from 255 pounds to 170, and she was so proud of me. I have this fear that she'll be so disappointed if I start packing on weight because she died, like she did, that she'll haunt me for it. So...I just don't eat unless someone nags me to.

I wish there was a magic way to deal with it other than food, but I think we all have food issues to begin with in modern society and that's the first place we let out stress.