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Permalink Reply by bluebird on July 28, 2018 at 10:25pm

It's not uncommon, what you're feeling.  For me, I basically feel as though the only emotions I even have anymore are sadness and anger, and I never used to be that way before my husband died (I was always an optimistic and loving person, before). As you said, there is no pleasure in anything anymore.  

I don't have the feeling of not being able to trust any people, but my guess is that comes from your husband having suicided. If my husband had done that, I think I would have lost my ability to trust, too. It makes sense, in that the person you love most broke your trust, in a way, so why would you believe that you could trust anyone else? You probably can, though, but that doesn't mean it's easy for you to get to the point of feeling that way.

Anyway, I don't know what else to say, but I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone.

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Permalink Reply by Shani Friedman on July 31, 2018 at 3:31pm

This is my first time checking out the site and responding. I'm sorry for your loss and I know how you feel. I have a lot of anger right now since my loss in May. It's hard for me to cry in front of people but I've found that sometimes it happens whether I want it to or not. And it is a little easier than it used to be. I hope you allow some friends and family back in. They've helped me, especially the ones going through the loss with me. Talking to a grief counselor has also been beneficial. 

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Permalink Reply by Michelle on July 6, 2019 at 6:38pm

Maybe you are feeling so much hurt inside. That anger is the easiest way to release it.

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