Well now it's 9 months and counting.   I miss you always and forever times infinity.  This last week has been absolutely amazing.  It started out the same ol same ol it's been these last 9 month's carrying all of the garbage inside and wondering how much longer I can take it and asking over and over why did this all happen.  And then  BAM!  It happened.  The moment I never even remotely thought would happen.  The gift.  A gift that offers me a release from some of the pain.  That portion of the pain that has angered me every day.  Relief about some of those worries.  But it was the gift of explanation over that situation.  I'm blown away at the answer.  It had to happen the way it did to come full circle at just the right moment and this week that moment came.  I've felt you near me much more these past few weeks.  Keep doing that.  I've gotten more rest the last two days probably than I have the entire year since that situation has suddenly been explained.  The weight in that area has been lifted.  9 months.  The number 9.  How odd but you and I know how appropriate.  What a week.  AMAZING!

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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My dad was the best human I’ve ever known.
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