My husband passed away

My husband passed away last Saturday after a long illness. His memorial service is next week. We have three boys, ages 14, 11, and 6. I'm glad I found this place. It seems to be a place of great caring and support. I actually registered here a while before my husband's passing, as I was grieving for his loss after he entered a nursing home. He had been there since the end of 2008, after being diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's disease in 2006 and deteriorating quickly. He was only 58 when he passed.

The boys are doing fairly well. They feel that they had lost their dad awhile ago, and hadn't visited him very often due to the severify of his illness. For awhile now, I don't think he knew me when I visited.

I'm having a difficult time. Even though I had time to prepare for this, I didn't really feel prepared when he passed. This is very hard.

Thanks for this site. I'm sure I'll find comfort and support here.

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Permalink Reply by Speed Weasel on May 30, 2025 at 2:08pm

So sorry for you with his passing. That is rough, that there has been so much time between the initial diagnosis and the final moments.  On top of the 'normal' grief, you may also start to feel relief, which is likely to add to the confusion and sadness.  If that does happen, do not feel guilty or weird, it may even be expected/normal.

Keep talking through your pain and loss.  People within your existing circle will likely move on far faster than you will...that too is expected and normal.  We all have lives to attend to.  It will likely hurt, and you may feel betrayed, but it is human nature.  Try to form some new connections while leaning on your existing support circle...new connections will be an outlet to grow into the new (post-loss) you and haven't heard the stories yet, so they can be a wonderful source of support and processing through the loss.

Keep your head up and reasons to smile will return (at least that is what everyone keeps suggestion to me).

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