I feel like the only man to lose the love of his life with no apparent reason.  I find great compassion communicating with women and do enjoy the back and forth of sharing feelings. 

But I still find I need some fellowship with men who have experienced what I am going through right now. 

Is it because women are more willing to seek help than men or is it the reality that men have a higher mortlity rate?

I am 54 and spent nearly half of my life with a woman I fell for at first sight.  Not that our romance started right then, in fact I didn't see her again for 5 years even though we worked in the same building.

We were blessed and now I, like many women have stated am alone, confused very, very sad and apprehensive at the prospect of living a life without her.

If your out there, get in touch, we can't suffer this pain alone just because we're men.

Views: 260

Replies to This Discussion

Hi, Jim; just recently joined and I too suddenly lost my wife just over 3 months ago as of this writing. I feel the same way you have stated. It seems like there are few of us that wish to talk about it, but I'm really hoping to learn from other folks that are coping with this and try to get some sort of structure in this new and frightening life without her by my side.

I hope this finds you well and that you have peace in your world.

-Rich

I know some men who have gone through this and they seemed to think they had "to be tough" because they are men. Also many of the people they seen throughout there day thought it best to avoid the subject of loss to protect them... when in reality these guys wanted to talk about there wives and cry openly too. If you wanna exchange email I am willing to and I am still learning as I go. I have heard he term "new normal" in my grief class. To me its not normal its a bad dream that does not go away. 

is this thread still active?

Unfortunately, there happens to be a few of us out there with the same experience of loss.  My wife died suddenly, too young (52), not supposed to happen this way! Society has set into our minds that us males are supposed to die before the females, just the way it is to be according to?   But, then someone like you or myself come along as a younger widower and no one knows how to react.  I would not wish this experience on my worst enemy!  Think only thing worse would be burying your own child, which I witnessed my poor father-in-law have to do.  It sucks totally, but life never is easy I guess.  Keep strong!

Pablo,

I don't know how I missed your message!  It's been almost a year, and though time passes, it feels like I take one step forward and two steps back.

I remarried on New Years Eve, 2012, and love my wife greatly, but the pain of losing a spouse never leaves and I find myself on the verge of tears 24/7.

The biggest issue has been anxiety.  Going to bed and having your daughter wake you up a 1am, freaking out because she found her mom dead is pretty traumatic.

Her it is more than 5 years later and I still have to remind myself that I was traumatized by that and it doesn't just leave or disappear.

RSS

Latest Activity

david karpe posted a status
"I'm wondering if Myrna is well. Happy new year to Myrna and everybody."
9 hours ago
david karpe is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
12 hours ago
Sasha Moshko posted a discussion

My Fathers Loss

Many years ago, I lost my father after his battle with colon cancer that later spread to his bones. The grief stayed with me longer than I expected. Ambrosia Behavioral Health helped me work through that loss, understand my emotions, and find healthier ways to cope and move forward. https://www.ambrosiatc.comSee More
yesterday
Sasha Moshko left a comment for Sasha Moshko
"Professional help gives you a safe space to talk, understand your emotions, and learn healthy ways to cope. It can make grief feel less overwhelming and easier to manage over time. https://www.ambrosiatc.com"
yesterday
MELANIE WALENDOWSKY BAKER is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
yesterday
Krystal Swinehart joined Jodi Denton's group
Thumbnail

Traumatic loss of an only child

I started this group so that people who have lost their only child or the only child that remained, as in my case, could come together because I believe people that did have a child or children who now have none have special issues.
Monday
Krystal Swinehart joined Dayna's group
Thumbnail

Loss of a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide

If you have lost a loved one to alcohol, substance abuse or suicide please share your story or feelings here. Share the love and beauty of the one you lost. Losing someone any of these ways is not natural and can be hard to understand and ask why? I lost my Mother to an overdose 9 years ago. She also suffered from major depression. Her doctor got her hooked on pain medication and she was addicted most of my life. These doctors who were suppose to help her ended up killing her in the end. I also…See More
Monday
Karen R. replied to Entony's discussion Movies about grief that actually understand loss — any recommendations?
"So sorry!💔💔💔💔💔"
Jan 2

© 2026   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service