Grief - such an interesting process.  The question is, according to "Healing After Loss" are there benefits to us in grieving?  We do get attention and sympathy from those around us. Perhaps we're able to avoid responsibilities that were never on our list of favorite things to do anyway?  How about the fact that grief can actually make us feel even closer to our lost loved one? 

Here's the punch line - of course we want to stay close to our loved one, BUT it's the person we need to hold in our minds; dwelling on the loss only gets in the way of our doing that.

"My hope is found in my love, not in the degree of my grieving"  Peace

Views: 63

Comment

You need to be a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community to add comments!

Join Online Grief Support - A Social Community

Comment by bluebird on July 6, 2014 at 5:54pm

I truly hope you find the peace, hope, and desire for life that you want, and that you will eventually be with your son again.

Comment by Gale Brunault on July 6, 2014 at 5:37pm

I truly understand wanting our loved ones here - that's the best case scenario.  Although it's only been a month since I lost my son, I am trying to process this horrific grief the best way possible.  When a friend gave me the book "Healing After Loss", I began reading and blogging.  It has helped me immensely (even if only for a miinute out of my grief stricken day).  The perspectives are so thoughtful, truthful and compassionate that I find myself looking forward to reading each daily meditation. 

Believe me Bluebird there are days that all I want is to be with my son - after all how can I go on without him?  Healing After Loss has given me a smidgen of hope that I may be capable of "living" again; not today, not tomorrow, but someday.  I'm willing to hold out for that someday.  Peace to you.

Gale

Comment by bluebird on July 6, 2014 at 3:35pm

That's a lovely way to look at it, but I can't agree.  To me, holding my husband "in my mind" is simply nowhere near enough -- I need to have him here, with me, and failing that I need to be wherever he is, but I do not have faith in an afterlife, so I don't even know if he is anywhere. And so I have no real hope. I try to hope that there is an afterlife, but I long for death either way.

Latest Activity

Hannah joined Laura Rozier's group
Thumbnail

Losing Someone to Drug Overdose

If you've lost someone you loved due to them overdosing on drugs, let's talk about it here.See More
Tuesday
Hannah posted a discussion

Does anyone else feel pressure to always reply because you're afraid it'll be the last conversation?

Hi everyone. This is my first post here.I lost my brother in December 2024 to an accidental overdose. He passed away suddenly in his sleep. We were only a year and a half apart in age, and he was the closest person I've ever had.One thing I've been struggling with ever since is that I feel an overwhelming pressure to reply to texts and answer calls as soon as I can. If someone messages me and I don't respond right away, my mind starts thinking, "What if something happens to them before I reply?…See More
Tuesday
Profile IconHannah and Alyona joined Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Tuesday
Willy replied to Rosa Guzmán's discussion Grandma sewing room
"Hi Rosa, First, I am so sorry for the loss of your grandmother. Losing someone you love only two days ago is incredibly painful, and it’s understandable that you’re feeling unsure about what to do right now. Personally, I don’t…"
Jul 5
Willy updated their profile
Jul 5
Willy posted a status
"If you’ve lost someone you love, what is one memory of them that still makes you smile?Today I’m remembering my wife and would love to hear"
Jul 5
Willy is now a member of Online Grief Support - A Social Community
Jul 5
Carmen Huddleston updated their profile
Jun 23

© 2026   Created by Ninja.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service