your memory haunting me
your face flashing in front of my eyes
your voice quoting napoleon dynamite
plays inside my head.
it's been so long
why do I still remember you like this
why do I picture your face
every time someone mentions cancer?
I love you
I loved you
but you were taken from me
by the god I am told loves me
why did he do that?
how loving can he really be?
How could he let someone
as amazing as you die?
how could he love someone
as horrible as me?
someone who cuts her body
to deal with
pain
anger
frustration
grief
how can he love someone
who purposefully desecrates
the sacred temple of her body?
someone who cant even love herself?
there can only be one answer...
he can't...
he can't...
he can't...