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Comment by Vicki on June 5, 2016 at 2:25pm

Dear Mary I totally feel your pain. I lost my husband almost 7 weeks and I hope everyday it gets easier, but it just doesn't. Yes it only been getting harder. Yes the WHY's don't stop. He was the best dad anyone could ever ask for and my kids do not deserve it, especially my son who's only 11. That is such a critical age (just before teens) for a boy and his dad. His dad promised him so much as he got older and now I'm left to answer "who is gonna do it with me". Yes there are uncles, but is it same as dad. I guess one day at a time. Only time is on our side.

Comment by Mary on June 3, 2016 at 4:40pm

Hi Karen. Yes exactly. I understand all the well meaning people and I know I need to continue living - I also have 3 kids who need me, youngest is 16. But it's that feeling of overall emptiness , like a black cloud of sadness and loneliness. We were high school sweethearts and been together 35 years. We still felt the same now as when we were younger if not more. We loved eAch other deeply and shared that constantly. To live daily without him is unbearable. Like you said, that feeling is unbearable. So many whys, why now, too soon, we were so happy, he was such a great dad, the kids need him in their lives, I need him - why us? Why so cruel?
Thank you for your response. It's nice to talk with someone who is there. However my sympathy to you for your loss.

Comment by karen baer on June 3, 2016 at 3:37pm

I lost the love of my life 4weeks ago after only 13years of marriage.  I feel your pain and yes, no one knows unless they have been through it, too.  Although, I am glad I can say there is no shortage of support from friends and family it is still not the same as having my beloved, best friend, Harry here with me.  I get sad. I get angry. I often feel like an empty shell feeling hopeless. People just don't get it. I really hate it when people say and act like moving on is so easy or even an option. It is not for me. I had the love of my life. you only get one of those. he is irreplaceable. I bet you feel the same just from reading your short post....But  what I can say with confidence is that we never stop loving our spouses, it will never be easy. We are scarred deeply, however, we have to learn to find a new normal and figure out how to live with our loss rather then "get over it" as we are told...this is only the beginning for us. the road is terribly long ahead for us. it gets harder, not easier because to me it just confirms he really is never coming home. you are not alone...I hate this feeling too.

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