Last night my sons and I went to the restaurant that my husband and I had our last date in 7 weeks ago. The next day he passed away.  I thought that by going there, which I was afraid to do, it would help me face his death.  I don't know if this was the right thing to do. It only made me miss him more.  I am an emotional wreck although on the outside I appear together.  I cry everyday and then go to work or go do my chores but I have suddenly felt all alone in this.  I guess this is because this was a holiday week and everybody is busy.  I wish I could just go be with him.  If I know this is not right because God decides all this but I wish it just the same.  It is so very hard to live without the love of your life who treated me like his bride my whole life practically.  He spoiled me.. Not monetarily...just with his companship his smile he made me laugh we talked we loved.  Everything was passionate between us. I am just so lost.  I don't know how to fill this void.  I probably never will.   I love you my angel in heaven.