WE HAVE HAD A CRISIS HERE. JAMES' FRIEND AND OUR ADOPTED SON CHRIS WERE DRINKING IN THE GARAGE. THEY HAD BEEN DRINKING FOR A LONG TIME TODAY. WHEN I LEFT AROUND 1:30 TO GET MY HAIR DONE CHRIS ASKED ME TO BUY HIM A PACK OF CIGARETTES AND I SAID YES. WHEN I GOT HOME AROUND 4:30 JAMES WAS PAST OUT ON THE COUCH AND CHRIS HAS FALLEN ONTO THE FLOOR. I DIDN'T THINK MUCH ABOUT IT. ROGER CAME HOME A FEW MINUTES AFTER I DID AND TRIED TO GET CHRIS ONTO THE COUCH. CHRIS WAS DEAD. WE TRIED TO DO CPR ON HIM… Continue

Worried tonight. Husband went to specialist and news isn’t great. Doctor thinks he has a fatty liver. They are doing tons of blood work to find out why but doctor mentioned several reasons and none of them good. He is also scheduled for a liver biopsy to see how far the disease has progressed. Will I end up losing him like we did our daughter? Did the cancer come back? God how scared I am.

Nine years ago the clock stopped. The sun quit shining. The world stopped turning. How could it be nine years ago when it seems like yesterday? I can still see her lying on the ground, people so many people working on her. Then nothing. They said she was gone. Gone where I thought. I held her in my arms, screaming “my baby, my baby” over and over in my mind, in the air. God how could you take her? She wasn’t done. She had so much more work to do here. I need her. We need her. Am I having a… Continue

Will there be Birthday cake and presents in heaven? Will all the angels sing Irene happy birthday? On the day she was born it was sunny, clear and warm. The first time I held her I thought my heart would break from joy. This tiny bundle, so fragile was mine. Thank you God.

As the years pasted she grew into this amazing intelligent, beautiful woman, who could make me laugh when no one else could. Her blue eyes and long blond hair lit up a room as she entered. We became more than Mother and… Continue

The sun will be coming up soon. As yet I've not gone to bed. What is the use when I can't sleep. The last time I went to the doctor he gave me something to help with that, but so far it hasn't done a thing. So most nights find me in front of my computer, a lot of times just staring into space.

One week from today and it will be Irene's 35th birthday. I wonder what she would look like. Would the tiny lines around her eyes be starting to show? Would she still have that long, long hair or… Continue

What a bitter sweet day it is today. I'm trying to be happy for those still here by me, but my heart is heavy because my daughter, Irene is not here. What I wouldn't give to see her smile, hear her laughter just once more. Feel her arms around me for one more hugs. For all of us this is a hard day. I am praying for everyone as we walk through this day. I know that I am not alone. I have all of you. God bless you all and we shall make it through today, for we are all holding hearts and hands,

I couldn't beleive the support that I have recieved so far when I logged on today. In the death of our daughter I keep telling myself that we were lucky to have such a special relationship with her from the time she was young until the she was taken away from us. But that doesn't really help. The hole that is left in my heart is much to large to heal. I have more bad days than good. My family say I should get over it. Are they right? It has been almost 8 years now. The support I received here… Continue

Greetings Everyone,

I have come here hoping to find some peace. I not only lost a daughter, but I lost my best friend. Irene was 27 year and 29 days old when she died in front of us that day. Her anniversary is coming up in June but her birthday was in May so this time of year gets hard for me. On top of that my husband had cancer and we're just getting through that. I'm feeling so alone and drepressed so I thought I'd like to reach out and see what happens. This will be the 8th year… Continue