Ashley Nicole's Blog – January 2013 Archive (1)

I don't want to feel this.

I'm just a little girl who wants her parent's love back again... I want my Dad to be here to pick me over drugs and drinking... that's all I've ever wanted was to feel like I was worth it.  Mom chose me... I was her world... but the problem was that she still picked drinking over me.  I cried and cried and basically begged, and all she said was "it will always be my downfall..." And she continued drinking.  She chose me, but only to an extent.  The other person that I've loved deeply…

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Added by Ashley Nicole on January 29, 2013 at 7:48pm — No Comments

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My mom died 4 months ago

My mom had pulmonary fibrosis. She was sick for a few years. It was funny how when my grandmother smoked, my mom would always say-I’m gonna die from second hand smoke. My mom never smoked. She died from lung disease. Ironic.I was fine at the funeral. Planning. Talking to everyone. I thought u handled it great. Now 4 months later, I’m a mess. Some days I’m perfectly fine, but others I can’t walk down the street without crying. I keep thinking that I haven’t talked to her in a while & I…See More
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My dad was the best human I’ve ever known.
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