Karen, I don't know any details of your grief or how old you are, but I had a similar experience.  My husband passed away suddenly at home from a massive heart attack.  He died on the 35th anniversary of our meeting.  He had been sick for many years but it was still a shock to me to get out of bed and find him on the floor already gone.  I have been told that he wouldn't have even known what was happening to him so all the pain is with the people who are left behind.  This happened in February 2009 and although I can now get through each day without wanting to join him I still miss him so much that it hurts.  I don't have any support from his family due to a fallout years ago but I have my two children to help me.  I hope that you have someone that can be with you when you need them even if no words are spoken, sometimes that is all that is needed.  Know that it does get easier to bear but the pain and loss never go away.  Just keep breathing and know that you are not alone.  Feel free to message me any time and I will keep you in my prayers.