wish I could see it that way and wrap my heart around it. I cannot. In time,

perhaps I will find some peace in just knowing he is no longer suffering.

Right now, I wish I could have done so much more and I am angry that

this is the way people treat each other in our society. I need to grow

and pass through how I feel right now. Thanks for sharing.

Deb, it's Deb...forgot to tell you I will be away visiting my in-laws so won't be able to write till middleof next week...Hang in there we've got to stick together

Greetings. Yes, it is a long process, we're all different of course, but I found the first year to be better than the second, I was still a bit in shock, I guess, and there was much newness to the situation. This year has been a time of letting go, which is a painful process in itself. I am looking forward to trying new approaches in the coming year. I am sorry for your loss. My best to you.

Thank you so much for your kind words. My heart goes out to you. I know how hard this is for you. I feel almost exactly how you do. The way you described your relationship with your husband sounds just like me and Larry. Life just seems so wrong without him. My husband died of cancer, but it was very sudden. He died one week after we found out. There was no time to get use to the idea or plan for anything. It must be even worse for you. The depth of this pain can't be put into words, I know. The only people who seem to really understand are those like ourselves.  I am so sorry you know what this feels like. I wish I could help you. You sound so much like I feel. It is impossible to describe what it is like to lose your soulmate.

By the way Deb, my name is also Deb

Well I wish I could say I was past that, but I'm not. Each day is a struggle and I miss him more and more. we were so very close and did everything together. He was precious beyond belief. He spoiled me and loved me so much. No I do not like my life without him. as a matter of fact it sucks. The one thing I do have is a strong faith that I will see him again someday...and so I go on with that hope.