I think it's insane to think we ever stop missing our Mamas or feeling sad. I think grief is a life long process that changes with healing and time, but always present. I am a year in and cannot imagine ever feeling resolved! My Mama brought me into this life and that bond is forever etched in my heart....sniff...to all you beautiful grieving folks, I send love and gentleness. Just let your heart to the navigating...hugs

charity wolf and others no the pain does not go away ever ever. i have bee in touch with martha since 2 years and waht she says is  one way to look at it ie we may need to conduct ourselves and take the steps until God calls. The first few years may be a blur and its years mind you but i literally am taking it a month at a time and functioning.  i try to mix it up by keeping occupied, going to philosophical seminars/grief readings and basically what i call surviving well.  Good to see martha back here sometimes.

 I miss my mom she has been gone 1 year She was 92 and was unable to be alone due to her falling.I told her to come home and live with me where family would be around .She said no when she got that bad she would go in a nursing home.Last july she wanted to be put there so she did.we cleaned out her apartment and she went in.For the first few months things went ok but then due to having fell at home she wasn't able to walk with a walker and had to be in a wheelchair all the time.I aug 1st was her birthday she turned 92 we had a party for her in aug she was her self. Then has the months went on she wasn't eating and loss weight. she just keep going down hill I could see this wasn't working for her so I called my 2 girls and asked if I took her out and put her back in the apartment and I stayed during the week and helped her if on weekends they could help so I could have a break with the 3 of us she could be home and cared for.they said no if she came out I could do it.So I couldn't do this alone 24 7 myself as the weeks went buy she wanted not to be there and wanted to come home with me but I was in NY and she was in mass. So she just gave up and was not eating and losing weight and things just went down hill from there .She passed away Jan 8th 2015. There is a lot more to this then anyone knows also but shes gone. Its been a year to the day and I haven't talked to my girls and never will .I have to live with this everyday knowing something could have been down if I could have got help to have her home she would be a live today.I will never forgive or forget this.

My Mama flew away one year ago this month. I thought last year was tough but so far, year two is kicking my ass. It feels like a fog lifted and now I am left with this intense reality. I know that time does not heal on it's own. I am just in so much hurt and we all know how hard carrying pain is. It feels like I am learning how to breath, walk and even sleep, for the first time. Only this time I have a broken heart....May we all continue to love ourselves and honor our unique grief journeys....I know that for myself, allowing my sadness has not been so easy, always. I love you all..

ps: My Mama was only 63 and her illness was fast and furious. I have to deal with that trauma too........Goddess help us!

I think the second year, and the years following that one, are harder to deal with because the numbness and shock wear off and reality sets in.  I am in year six of grieving for Mama. Time doesn't heal the wound--how COULD time heal such a loss! But the grieving becomes different. I don' t know how to explain it, and I'm not saying its better, just different.  I used to could not even say the words, My Mom died. Now I say those very words. But the stabbing pain in the pit of my stomach still happens. And she is still on my mind every day. Especially on Mondays...

Hi Rebecca, I am so sorry for your loss...

 I felt a lot of dizziness and all of what you describe. I do want to say that your Mama is still with you in spirit. Knowing that is the only way I get through. I see my Mama in the trees, birds and everywhere. Maybe you can look for your Mama? Maybe that will help bring you some peace? I know how insanely painful this journey is....hug 

Hi Felicia

 Thank you for your words. I am preparing myself for this second year. I so feel the numbness is gone. I don't know what lies ahead of me but I do know my Mama is always with me. It's just such an indescribable pain. It's like my whole world has stopped. Everything is still except my torn open heart....through my torn heart the light gets in. sending you love...

Hi Charity!  Sending love and hugs your way too. Your Mama sure raised a kind and sweet girl!  A sort of amazing thing began to happen to me about two or three years after mom died.   I began to remember things long forgotten. Memories of me and Mom from way back when I was a little girl. And I can't recall ever remembering these things before Mom died. It's like the intense grieving jarred my mind, and these memories slowly started coming back. Before this, my memories were like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle scattered here and there. But then it was like some of the puzzle pieces were coming together and I started getting a clearer picture of Mom and I, and our life together, when I was younger.  I started writing these memories down. Sometimes it makes me miss her that much more, but at the same time, its comforting too.  I'm wondering if anyone else has had this happen?

Hi everyone.  It has been four months since my mom left, but it still feel like it was just minutes ago.  It still hurts so much.  I talk with her everyday.  I talk with her about things we used to do together when I visited her.  I know she is with me every place I go.  It is very hard to accept that she is gone.  I love her and miss her so much.  I was just touching her dress few minutes ago, looking at her picture, kissing her picture.  It is really sad.  My heart is broken.

thank you so much, Felicia:) I have experienced some of what you describe. I have noticed memories coming back from way into my childhood. It is a gift in this sadness, huh? Thank you for sharing with us....hug

Karen, I send you so much love...what helps me is knowing my Mama is still with me. I have a new intention in my life, to live the way she would want me to. Do any of these ideas help? You deserve to find some peace... You deserve to have joy my friend. I know it is hard ...hug

It's been almost 2 years.

After she died I lost something irreplaceable. My life's been over ever since then. That's all there is to say. I will continue to live in this hell... 

We will never ever be the same without our mothers, those of us that shared that special bond. We are all fortunate to have had that in our short lives because not everyone does. My father died 2 weeks before my 11th birthday so my mother was my rock and as of today 3 years ago I have been drifting without my rock. She left me to take care of her final wishes and it has not been easy and nobody in my little family has really understood what a very hard road that I have traveled since finding her before the nurses did very shortly after she had passed away. Every day I wonder would it have made a difference had I been there right at that precise moment? She was continuing on her journey without me and honestly I think that had I been there I would have joined her by whatever means. She was my everything. I had to tell the nurses that she had passed. She was still warm to the touch. I have regrets because there are so many that are there right when their loved pass away. Then again I do think that journey is one we make alone as when we are born into the world alone. I wish I could talk to somebody about what I think and feel but I just don't think anyone has the same emotions when the love of their lives moves on without us. Three years and still feeling so very lost. Peace to all of you.

first off I wanted to send my love to everyone on here that is hurting.....

 My Mama died one year ago last month. I am finding the start of this second year to be so brutal. I am still so exhausted. I am not numb anymore so it is all about missing her now. She was in every area of my life...this is so rough. I know I am healing but I also know that I have a long, long journey ahead.  How do all of you cope with having to work? Does anyone here feel exhausted a lot?  hug

Diane,

Like you, I am not happy anymore.  Things I used to like I don't like anymore since my mom died.  Her death has changed my life. It has been 4 months since she left.  I am sad.  She left a big hole in my heart.

My Birthday is today. It's just this huge reminder she's not there. For the first time in my life. It's been three weeks. How do people deal with this? I have no family of my own. I miss my Mom and feel like such a little baby.

Hi I am new, it is comforting to read that I am not alone

Hi Theresa, I'm so sorry you had to join, but you are right it is comforting to talk to or read messages from those who understand. 

My mom died of sudden cardiac arrest on December 19, 2015.....

I am so sorry for your loss Theresa...hug

Thank you, its very difficult, in my opinion, when they are not sick, when they are taken unexpectedly.

My dad died 16 years ago of cancer from asbestos, I accepted that because I knew there was no other choice.

of course Theresa, it is so hard. My Mama died from a very rare brain disease. By the time we found out she only lived for a month and a half. It has been a year and I still feel blind-sighted. I just have to realize that my life is so changed and this new hurt is like no other. We have to be gentle with ourselves and take all the time we need. I cry everyday, everyday I hurt cause I loved/love her more than I can say....sending you a warm hug

my mum died aged 58 2 weeks ago, it doesnt seem real. i cant beleve shes gone. i dont kno how im going to go on without her 

sorry for your loss diane, its my mums funeral tommorow and i am dreading it

I have not had any dreams yet of my mom, its been almost three months.  Everyone says its because my grief has put a barrier up.  Every morning I wake up and have a sinking anxious feeling and then I keep thinking about the words my mom used to say, "Don't get too attached to anyone or anything on this earth, because we are only here temporarily, we will all go home one day".....

I hear you Janet, I am nine months on and it doesn't seem to be getting easier. They say it takes a year to start healing, but I honestly can't imagine that true. I ache for her everyday. 

My Mama passed on just over a year ago. There is no timeline to grief. Grief is an active healing and a journey. Our lives have forever changed. We have to let grief split us open and transform our hearts. That is how we carry on. We are still having a relationship with our Mothers and that can grow, deepen and be amazing. We are all on our special journey..may we all know that love is in us and around us,always...( I am learning)

Here almost 5 months and still crying and thinking about her every single day.  Talking to her every single day when I am going to work, when I am going back home and also when I am at work.  Still kissing her picture and talking to her picture.  It hurts, really hurts.  I miss her so much.

Its just about 3 months since my mom passed suddenly, and sometimes I just feel numb.  I hope she knows how much I loved her....the last thing I got to say to her was Ok mom I will meet you at Bryn Mawr Hospital...that was it.