Sandrw Mentiply

Female

Hoosick Falls, NY

United States

Profile Information:

About Me:: Am a widow 71 years of age I lost my mother Jan 8th 20015. She was 91 she wanted to go in a nursing home because I couldn't be with her all the time I lived in NY STATE and she lived in MASS. Am dealing with a lot of quilt because she just gave up and failed to thrive/
About my Loss:: I feel so quilty now because I should have said no and stayed in mass to care for her I could see she was giving up and should have taken her in a apartment and cared for her. She just gave up and I blame myself for leaving her there If I could go back I know I should have got her apartment and careed for her myself and she would still be here.I think about this all the time and break down.
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Felicia

Sandra, bless your heart! Your dealing with such a heavy load. I am so sorry for the loss of your mom. I am a nurses aide, and have worked with elderly folks for the past 23 years. I can honestly tell you that I have seen many families who were in situations like yours. Some were able to bring THEIR elderly parent home, but most of those who came home still failed to thrive because their poor little bodies were just worn out. I know it would have made you feel better to be able to do so, but please don't beat yourself up too much. Caregiving 24/7 is very difficult, as you know. I have a feeling that the reason your mom wanted to go to a nursing home initially was to spare you some of that. Its so hard, no matter what age we are, to lose a mom. Sending my love and a big hug to you!

Feb 2, 2016