I miss my mom especially this holiday but im doing ok, i hope you guys can have a good christmas, i wish that for you all....have a good night i hope....my heart goes out to all of you who are having a hard time out there

thanks for the comment Dia, thats very sweet, i will be ok and know im not alone, i went to my dr. today and it made me mad he didnt really listen when i feel this is a serious issue, i just hope to feel better soon, thanks though hun, i appreciate that

thanks for your comment too Boabie....i just want the darn thing out....its causing too many problems, im waiting for medical cleareance to have surgery, im glad others know what im dealing with, thanks so much hun

I wish my mom was here to spend Christmas with, but she always told me Christmas is every day....I need to remember that, and she is happy where she is right now....I just miss spending time with her....my husband isnt here either, but I am talking to my family, that helps, and my sister sent me flowers....i will come back often guys, thanks for the support!!

Merry Christmas. I woke up not knowing what to feel today. I miss her so much and I know each of you feel the same way. I am thankful she is no longer in pain and even though she is not here physically she is always with us in spirit. Today will be difficult because Christmas was my moms favorite and she was always the first person I called in the morning. I pray I find the strength to stay strong for my daughter who is 13. My mom would want me to make her day special. I hope everyone finds a way to get through the day. Thank you for being here for me and I am here for all of you.

Thanks Dia.

I thought I could just ''skip'' Christmas eve, treat it like any other night, but it was awful. Maybe it's the feeling that a lot of people were celebrating, with all their loved ones, their world is the same, they don't know this sadness.

Merry Christmas everyone! I just want people on here to know that I'm still thinking of them even though I'm not on this site as much as I used to be. The anniversary of my mom's death is the 27th so its like a double whammy because my mom always had a tree and gifts for us on Christmas and its hard knowing I can't talk to her.

these past few days have been challenging; christmas eve was always my Mom's favorite.  So, I mixed things up a bit and got out of the house; although my BF invited me to their family dinner, that was the kind of setting that would only make me dwell on the fact that Mom was no longer here.  So, I visited those friends, then invited 3 other close friends out to dinner, then we went to church.  Somehow, I got through it w/out losing it, but there were a few moments.  Particularly during the sermon when the priest spoke about "others who made Christmas special who are no longer with us..."   ugggg.  But, the larger point was that as generations pass on it's up to the current one to make XMas special for others...which I think is true.  XMas day seemed more routine somehow, as I had dinner at a friend's home.  Getting out and about seemed to help.  But, I missed Mom terribly, nonetheless. 

I hope everyone had a good Christmas despite missing our mom's.  My mom always loved Christmas as many of you mentioned.  We would gather Christmas eve for our celebration.  We have done that all of the years I have been alive.  This Christmas Eve I was at home alone although I was invited to spend the evening with others. I did spend sunday with family.  I have felt numb the past few days.  One  year ago today was the last time I had a conversation with my mom.  The last time she was able to communicate with others as her body was shutting down.  There was  nothing we could do anymore.  I knew something was wrong, I kept asking her if she wanted to go to the doctor/hospital, she told me no, that she just needed to rest. She died 2 days late.  I just have such a hard time comprehending that it has been a whole year. 

hi all im glad i have you all to talk to....i was in the hospital yesterday pretty sick, and they still dont know whats wrong, but ive been scared alot and i hope my health returns soon....its really scary when you feel bad and dont know whats wrong, but im a strong person and hanging in there.....im just thankful i have somewhere to talk to people, it helps, hate that i had to spend christmas in the hospital, but its ok, i just need to feel better

it took my mind off my mom though and depressive thoughts, and thats a good thing....i will be ok, i will persevere, im young and have alot of good stuff on my side

this has been a challenging time for me, my health is at a bad point, and i keep thinking about my mom cause she always got me thru things....i just hope things improve and mom, i love and miss you and just please bathe me with peace in my heart while i go thru this....life is so precious, i want to be better and hopefully soon

My mom died on March 18th, 2011.  This was my third Christmas alone, totally alone.  How many more years do I have to endure this?

The pain of this first holiday without my mother has been compounded by the silence from family. The ones that claimed they cared the most, let me down and what hurts worse, let her down. I hope she can't see how they have been and how much it has hurt me. She doesn't deserve that, she loved them too much. I have been patient and given the benefit of the doubt and chance after chance as she taught me to do. But now my heart can no longer take the pain of making an effort with them, only to be hurt. I had to accept it when she was alive for her. She accepted the selfishness of others as their weakness and to rise above it. Two wrongs don't make a right. I no longer have to do that, I have changed. Now, I will go forward into a new year, with a new attitude and strength on my own. I hope everyone here has gotten through the holidays as well as they could. Has anyone else given up on family that has let you down and left you to deal with your grief alone, without any support from them during the holidays? 

Happy New Year Everyone! 
That is so weird to say, because this was the first time I have never heard my Momma say that to me.  However, I am determined I will continue the tradition on for my family.  I cooked pork chops, black eyed peas and corn bread and took it to my Dad's house so they could have the same meal my Mom made every New Years Day.

I love that Tracey! I am hungry reading what you cooked LOL! This is also the first year not being with my mom for my b day, holiday's, and for the New Year.  I cooked a big meal today, and I made her favorite cake for Xmas. Normally we would have picked her up and brought her to our house for dinner as usual. I sure miss her voice and her smile. I think she'd be glad we kept the party going.

Yes. Sheila B. My mother sounds a lot like yours. I have tried to be there for my sister since our mother passed last Feb. She has not been nice to me. I am also on my own. Mom left me in charge. I am not a punching bag. We have not spoken since she told me to go to hell a few days before Christmas. We never have gotten along so this is nothing new. Onward through the fog.

Jean: I"m so sorry about your mom,my mom died Dec 27,2012. My brother and I aren't close so I know what that's like, sometimes you just can't have a relationship with a sibling. Please don't be too hard on yourself, as you have made an attempt to get along with your sister.

happy new year to everyone, even though my health isnt doing well, i hope all are well this new year....i hope and wish good things for all of us

My mom passed away November 29th in our hotel while we were in St. Louis for my daughters open heart surgery. They never did an autopsy to find out what happen. She died in my arms. I tried to do cpr and I called 911 but nothing was good enough. This has been the single most difficult things I have ever had to deal with. I am trying to be strong. My 3 year old step grandchild was with me and my mom in the hotel room. She lives with me. It is very hard to try and not cry in front of her or break down completely. My daughter in completely healed Praise God!!! I just wish my mom was here to see it. She was the person I ran to when things were hard to handle and now I cant run to her. Monday makes a month ago that we buried her. Every time I think about it I feel like I cant breathe.  Thank y'all for listening.

Kim, I am sending you a big hug right now! I am so very sorry for the loss of your mom, and the devastating way in which it happened. Know that she is right there with you in spirit and that her love for you and your love for her will never end. I truly believe that true love is forever and that we will see our loved ones again one day. Blessings to you!

Kim, my heart goes out you!

Kim I am so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel my mom had a heart attack in front of me and I also tried CPR and did everything I could. The thoughts are always in our heads of what else we could of done but I know we did our best. I am here if you ever need to talk. It is nice knowing there are others that know how you feel. I am glad your daughter is healed. That is a blessing.. Big Hugs

My condolences Kim, that's tough to go through.  But, you know you did everything you could.  Life is really weird sometimes.  Ex.  one of my friends, his father took the Mom to the emergency room because she was having breathing problems.  She was in the ER for a very long time.  He then went home with intentions to come back shortly.  Well, PS, he had a heart attack and died there at home.  His wife was wondering why he did not come back....took them several hours to figure out what had taken place.  You just don't know what fate has in store.

ive been chatting on the main chat and just said that i miss my mom and i am still grieving, but God has given me the peace to move on, for those of you who are having a hard time, try and keepthe faith, it does get easier....the first year after my mom's death was so hard, but God brought me peace about it and I'm so thankful for that, you all please hang in there!!  I miss and love you mom!

It has been over 8 months now since I lost my beautiful Momma. Sometimes missing her is so intense it steals my breath. My only option is to retreat from those thoughts because if I dwell there, I'll lose it and not want to live anymore. I got engaged this past Christmas Eve and I should be happy but all I can think is she won't be there. I turned 30 on the 6th, as old as she was when she had me; my first birthday without her. Spent the day in the hospital where she was pronounced because my fiance was very sick and that was so incredibly hard for me. But my birthday wish came true; she visited me in a dream and she told me what I say aloud to her every day: "I love you and I miss you," though I wish she hadn't been crying.  I LOVE YOU AND MISS YOU SO MUCH MOMMY!

Hi Kristin, Happy Belated Birthday even though I am sure it was a hard day I know how you feel my mom died a week before my 38th bday and I didn't even feel like having one. I hope your fiancé is feeling better... Congrats on getting engaged you know your mom is so happy for you and just remember she is always with you. I know sometimes I have days where I feel lost and like a part of me is missing , but I have to tell myself my mom wouldn't want me to give up and either would yours. Dreams are great, I am waiting for those dreams to come to me its only been three months and I am sure she sends me signs everyday on what to do. Hang in there and know it does help to talk so I am here if you need an ear:)   

Thank you, Jill.

congratulations Kristin.  It's hard to accept, but life moves on and we will face many new things...some wonderful and others not so good.  It's hard to find peace at times, as you can never replace your Mom. But you can try to focus on the good memories when they arise, even in your dreams.

Rachel spoke of God bringing here peace; there may be some truth to that.  I recently returned to church last summer, about 6 months after Mom passed.  It seems to have helped a bit.  Picked a new church as well...as something of a fresh start. In last night's mass, the priest focused her sermon on how the events of life--such as the loss of a loved one-- can lead you back to the church, as they make you realize that it may not be enough to "go it alone".  There's something missing and returning to your faith helps support you going forward.  Definitely struck a chord for me.

hi everyone, im missing my mom alot, mostly becaue im having bad health problems and she was always there to comfort me....its so hard to be patient to find out whats wrong with me....i dont want to die, and im fearful of that.....i cant get my symptoms to calm down so that i dont worry.....i just wish she was here to give me a positive frame of mind....its so hard being sick

I need peace, I was at peace, but that peace isnt there right now....i'm really struggling, im not mad at God but I pray every night he will release me from this nightmare....there must be a reason he is allowing this to happen....

Rachel, it is so hard not having our mom's with us period. I know it must be double hard not having her physically present during your health problems. But, know that she is right there with you in spirit. I speak out loud sometimes as if I'm talking to my mom. I believe she can hear me. She has been gone for 5 months and I still cry often. I pray for you to be blessed and have peace of mind. We may never get over our loss, but with god we will get through it, one day at a time.

I think it's important to realize that our Mom's would want us to live our lives in good health, as best we can.  I like to think they are watching over us, providing some silent, secret guidance.  I've been preoccupied over the last 6 weeks w/my Aunt (Mom's older sister).  After a bad fall and many weeks in the hospital, she's now in an assisted living facility.  I see so many people there who don't know who they are or where they are...it's tough.  We all have our senses at least and can make decisions for ourselves.  Moms would want us to make the best ones possible, I think.  Next week will be a year for me w/out Mom...where did that year go?  It's mind numbing. 

its been 17 months since my mom passed and i still cry.  i cried hard this morning think of what a great mom she was to me.  how much she loved me and all her children.  she was amazing.  i love you mommy.  thank you for everything.  God bless you.

I hear you Michael.  It happened to me as well this evening.

@ Michael and Danny, I cried like a newborn yesterday. My mom has been gone for nearly 6 months. @ Missy, you have my heartfelt sympathy! My parents died a slow cancer death. It must be extra hard having to also deal with the suddenness and they way your mom died. I am glad you are in therapy, I went for a while also. I am so very sorry about the murder of your son. Know that I am praying for you to find comfort and the ability to eventually (whenever you feel ready) to move forward, in the midst of your double loss. Blessings Missy.

@ Missy, venting is good, and you are right, this is the place to do it. Even though the road to healing may be hard at times, I know you will get through this. We are all hear to listen and to offer support. Remember everyone heals at their own pace and time. Don't let anyone make you feel like you should be better. They don't know what you have been through. IM me anytime!

Wendy and missy, let's support each other.  Keep talking to people and also do your own grieving the way you want to.

Today marks one full year since my Mom's passing. Where did the time go.  RIP Ma, you are missed. Positive thoughts to you all.

Missy, I can't imagine what you're going through. I wish I knew something to say that could comfort you. I'm so sorry for your losses.

My Mom's been gone 9 months and I'm still a mess. I'm planning my wedding, which is bizarre and surreal, and I know I'm supposed to be happy but without her to share it with it just loses its meaning. I found out today that my father won't be coming and I took it really hard. He's never been there for me and it was the first time I'd spoken to him since my Mom died. I thought if there was ever a time he could step up for me, this would be it. And he said no. All I want to do is talk to my Mom and I can't! I'd trade it all for her.

It's been a bit quiet here lately; personally, I got swept up in family crises as my Mom's older sister took a bad fall before the Xmas holiday.  After hospitals, rehab, more hospitals, etc., I got her placed in an assisted living facility.  I kept thinking about my Mom during all of this...would she approve?  Is it OK?  I don't know for certain, but I hope she'd realize I was doing my best.

Kristen, Dia & Jeff hang in there. My mom has been gone for about 6 months. One son is about to Get his B.A. and another is making bad choices that cause us grief and turmoil. I have thought about this group many times, but just have not taken the time to write. I realize that like Jeff, there is still so much going on in our lives. It doesn't stop when our loved ones die. But, it does make things harder to deal with. At least for me. I too wonder what my mom would think of my decisions regarding my kids and life decisions in general. I always looked to mom for advice and approval.