Still Hurts

I lost my dad 3 months ago and it still hurts so bad. My dad & I were close and I am still at home with my mom and little brother so I was seeing him everyday. He was there that morning and then he died at his office---I never got a chance to say goodbye.

The hardest part is that my family isn't emotional at all. My mom and dad fought all the time and she is basically relieved after this. Every time that I am upset she tells me to stop and not be upset. My brother doesn't want to talk about it and my friend are all in their 20's too and don't know what to say.

Most of the time I'm alright but then it hits me in waves and I can't stop thinking about it. I know that my mom is emotionally better but it still hurts so bad. I miss him and I don't know what to do.

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Rachel Lynn Schuler on September 3, 2011 at 7:22am
god bless you liz, losing a parent is real real hard....i have lost both of mine, hang in there hun....sounds like me with the waves of grief, that was like me when my mom first died....but now, nothing, im numb, i'd rather be numb than feel intense pain like that.....all you can do is remember him, know he is still here with you, and go on as best you can hun...he is in such a good place even though you miss him....just know that
Permalink Reply by Sean Casey on September 3, 2011 at 2:45pm

I hear you.  My wife took her life a little over 6 months ago, and it still sometimes hits really hard.  It's kind of a mix for me between what you seem to be going through and what your mother's got going on,  I really don't miss a lot of the bad things that she had going on and was doing, but I deeply miss the friend and companion that I fell in love with and married.

 

I know for me a couple of things have helped.  One's been reaching out to people, like through this site.  I also know that getting to journal things out has helped, too.  It doesn't make the pain go away, but it does seem to help it pass easier when it does come up.  The third is just knowing that the emotions need to come up & be felt to process through them.  It doesn't make it hurt less or any fun when they do, but it helps to know that's part of the healing and not just a capricious universe torturing me.

 

*hugs*

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